Some people think government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems to help people prevent illness and disease. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #focus #pollution #illness #disease

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Some individuals believe authorities should concentrate on minimizing environmental contamination and housing issues to assist

people

prevent

Wrong verb form

in preventing

show examples

illness

and disease. I totally agree with

this

statement.

To begin

with, I completely believe

the

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

lawmakers should focus on mitigating environmental

pollution

and housing problems to help

people

prevent

illness

and disease. Regarding

pollution

, air

pollution

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a negative

impacts

Correct the article-noun agreement

impact

show examples

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

health.

This

is because air

pollution

lead to serious

diseases

namely, cancer, high blood pressure, and asthma.

Therefore

, by

adressing

Correct your spelling

addressing

air

pollution

the

government

can prevent

people

to get

Change preposition

from getting

show examples

these

diseases

and

illness

Fix the agreement mistake

illnesses

show examples

Furthermore

, the

government

should focus

to tackle

Change preposition

on tackling

show examples

the issue of

water

pollution

in order to

ehnance

Correct your spelling

enhance

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

health.

For example

, the

government

can build more desalination plants in

ordet

Correct your spelling

order

to make fresh

water

accessible for

people

Consequnetly

Correct your spelling

Consequently

, make fresh

water

available for all

people

, which

this

step

contribute

Change the verb form

contributes

show examples

prevent

Change the verb form

preventing

show examples

people

to get

Change preposition

from getting

show examples

illnesses and

diseases

Change preposition

show examples

water

contaminated

Replace the word

contamination

show examples

namely, HIV, and Ebola. When it comes to housing issues, many

people

live in overcrowding apartments, which

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

people

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

more vulnerable to

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

illnesses and

diseases

For instance

, when the

Covid-19

Correct your spelling

COVID-19

show examples

pandemic hit

people

who lived

Change preposition

show examples

overcrowding apartments

are

Wrong verb form

were

show examples

more likely to get

this

virus.

As a result

, the

government

should concentrate

to construct

Change preposition

on constructing

show examples

apartment

Fix the agreement mistake

apartments

show examples

in order to make houses less crowded.

Moreover

, many

people

struggle mentally because they cannot buy houses.

This

is because the price of

house

Add an article

the house

a house

show examples

is expensive.

Thus

, if the

government

make homes affordable

people

can feel comfortable mentally.

To sum up

, I strongly think the

government

should focus

Change preposition

show examples

alleviating environmental

pollution

and housing problems to help

people

prevent

illness

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Submitted by faiz3177 on Sun Jul 30 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure logical flow and coherence between sentences and paragraphs. Connect ideas more effectively.

coherence cohesion

Improve the introduction and conclusion to clearly present the main topic and provide a strong closing statement.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and avoid repetition of words and phrases.

grammatical range

Focus on sentence structure, verb tenses, and use of articles to enhance grammatical accuracy and variety.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

274 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
In many parts of the world girls and boys are educated together in co- education or mixed schools. Some people think that girls and boys benefit from being educated separately in single-sex schools. To what extent do you agree with this view ?
It is often considered that a few individuals reckon that males and females are educated together in co- education or mixed schools in manyfold parts of the nation. Whereas, many believe that girls and boys from being educated individually in single- sex institutions which is benefical for them. In my, an inclined, the learning should be in co- education schools. Thus, I completely assent from the notion which further leads to a logical conclusion.
5
band
the working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. do you agree or disagree?
There is an ongoing debate about the potential advantages and disadvantages of reducing the number of workdays in a week and extending the weekend for employees. I believe that reducing the working week is a positive and effective way to boost employee productivity and engagement.
5
band
Some people think that family has the most powerful influence on a child’s development, while others think that other factors such as television, friend, music have the biggest effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?
Multiple under-age criminal accidents are ubiquitous across many regions, indicating unsuitable children development. According to this issue, while some advocate house hold is the largest factor that tailored kids' traits, others argue that their daily circumstances are the most significant causes. Considering former contention, I personally believe both factors contribute to juveniles' characters and will elaborate my view points on the matter.
5.5
band
Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?
In today's fast-paced society, the complaint of insufficient sleep is increasingly common, with many individuals struggling to attain the recommended duration of rest. The ramifications of this pervasive issue extend beyond mere fatigue, as lack of sleep can lead to a myriad of health and cognitive problems. However, several strategies can be employed to address this concern and promote healthier sleep habits.
6
band
As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
In contemporary society, the internet has access to all news and websites while newspapers become venerable. I strongly agree with this statement Reading news via Internet is more convenient so newspapers become old-fashioned.

Some people think government should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems to help people prevent illness and disease. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many parts of the world girls and boys are educated together in co- education or mixed schools. Some people think that girls and boys benefit from being educated separately in single-sex schools. To what extent do you agree with this view ?

the working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that family has the most powerful influence on a child’s development, while others think that other factors such as television, friend, music have the biggest effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

As the internet becomes more popular, newspapers are becoming a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?