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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that children should not be given homework every day, while others believe that they must get homework every day in order to be successful at school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #homework #school
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In today's society, education has become a matter of significant concern. Some people argue that the
homework
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that is
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 given to
pupils
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 every day is crucial for the learning curve
while
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 others believe it is a burden on the student’s shoulders. In
this
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 essay, I will examine both perspectives before presenting my own opinion. On one hand, those who support daily
homework
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 argue that
pupils
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 can able to learn their lessons with the help of
homework
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 effectively.
For example
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, the
last
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 research shows that repetition
is
Verb problem
plays
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 a vital role in understanding and absorbing specific matter.
This
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 suggests that
pupils
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 would be successful in their
school
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 and life with studying systematically and daily
homework
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 could help to achieve learning goals.
On the other hand
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, proponents of the perpetual
homework
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 cycle could be tiring have asserted that students have been spending their time at
school
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 for a long time and
this
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 hectic schedule would affect them detrimentally.
Moreover
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,
pupils
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 can become isolated from their peers
due to
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 daily home routines because they have limited time to spend on hobbies and private
zone
Fix the agreement mistake
zones
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.
Thus
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,
this
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 tiring routine would not be beneficial for
pupils
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 physically and emotionally Having considered both perspectives, I firmly believe that the curriculum must be recreated with a balance between
homework
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 and student’s daily life.
Furthermore
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, teachers and experts should consider different methods to improve the learning process with minimum
homework
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.
For instance
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, Finland which has qualified and successful learning methods is known around the world because teachers expect
pupils
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 to learn a subject in
school
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. In conclusion, the issue of daily
homework
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 has valid arguments from both sides.
Nevertheless
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, after weighing the evidence, I am convinced that creating a balance between private and
school
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 life is necessary for a brilliant future.
Submitted by rose on

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task achievement
You’ve done well in presenting both perspectives and providing a balanced opinion. However, enhancing clarity and presenting more comprehensive ideas could further improve your essay. For instance, explicitly addressing counterarguments within each paragraph could solidify your points.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure can be improved by ensuring smooth transitions between sections and within paragraphs. Occasionally, the flow felt a bit abrupt, which might lead to confusion. Working on maintaining coherence throughout each section will make your arguments more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction is strong, clearly stating the issue and the arguments you will tackle, which helps set the stage for the essay.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes the arguments and provides a clear stance. This leaves a lasting impression on the reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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