IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory partofhigh school programmes To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #partofhigh #school #programmes
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some thinkers have an opinion that
students
Use synonyms
 in high school should mandatorily participate in volunteer
services
Use synonyms
. I wholeheartedly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement as
this
Linking Words
 work would facilitate them to learn the moral values towards society. If pupils do take part in community welfare, it brings empathy among them as they will get insights into the problems being encountered by the public every day. They try to alleviate those obstacles with their knowledge and
also
Linking Words
 take these matters to their parents and acquaintances.
As a result
Linking Words
, they feel connected towards the community.
For example
Linking Words
, many commerce
students
Use synonyms
 take part in cleaning the environment by growing saplings, and making people aware of their surroundings, and ,
eventually
Add a comma
eventually,
show examples
 when
such
Linking Words
students
Use synonyms
 become entrepreneurs in the future, they take care of corporate social responsibility and avoid unethical activities.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, others have a viewpoint that educators should focus their time and energy on academic courses rather than unpaid volunteer
services
Use synonyms
. If
students
Use synonyms
 adopt any of
such
Linking Words
services
Use synonyms
 in their day-to-day
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
, these activities may create a burden on them to solve the problems of needy people,
hence
Linking Words
, they may ignore their studies which would adversely affect their upcoming future.
For instance
Linking Words
, Indian educational institutes are more focused on their academic results rather than encouraging their scholars to enrol themselves in unpaid
services
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, though allocating certain hours of a day to welfare activities may deviate one from his studies, the result of
such
Linking Words
 actions can be commendable as these will teach him to become socially accountable.
Submitted by gurjotcheema7000 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Expand on the reasons why unpaid community service would facilitate students' learning of moral values and social responsibility.
coherence and cohesion
Organize the essay to include a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • civic engagement
  • empathy
  • intrinsic motivation
  • volunteerism
  • compulsory
  • divert
  • instill
  • practical life skills
  • sense of responsibility
  • community service
  • active members
  • diverse communities
  • future careers
  • work experience
  • personal freedom
  • punishment
  • learning experience
What to do next:
Look at other essays: