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Band 5

The pie chart provides information about transport use in Edmonton, and the table chart illustrates individuals’ reasons for using in those city.

The pie chart provides information about transport use in Edmonton, and the table chart illustrates individuals’ reasons for using in those city.
#information #transport #edmonton #individuals’ #city
The pie
chart
 provides information about transport
use
 in Edmonton, and the table
chart
 illustrates individuals’
reasons
 for using in
those
Change the determiner
that city
those cities
show examples
city
. A glance at the graph reveals that almost
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half
 of the
city
’s
people
 drive a
car
,
furthermore
, most of them
use
this
vihicle
Correct your spelling
vehicle
 to commute to
work
. Looking at the detail, the number of citizens driving a
car
 was the largest (45%),
whereas
 the
second
 major trend
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
showed
Wrong verb form
shown
show examples
 by
people
 using LRT with
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
35%.
On the other hand
, Bus and Taxi were both used
10
Change preposition
for 10
show examples
% of the total
travel
 which was much lesser than the
use
 of the other two. Among the
reasons
 for using cars in the
city
, more than
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
use
car
Add an article
the car
a car
show examples
 for getting to
work
.the
second
 highest percentage of
people
 used for
businees
Correct your spelling
business
businesses
 aim which was 10% less than
work
 commuting
reason
. For taking children to school 40% of
people
 travelled and shopping and leisure activities
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 another
reason
people
 travelled which was 40% of their total
travel
. The pie
chart
 provides information about transport
use
 in Edmonton, and the table
chart
 illustrates individuals’
reasons
 for using in
those
Change the determiner
that city
those cities
show examples
city
. A glance at the graph reveals that almost
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half
 of the
city
’s
people
 drive a
car
,
furthermore
, most of them
use
this
vihicle
Correct your spelling
vehicle
 to commute to
work
. Looking at the detail, the number of citizens driving a
car
 was the largest (45%),
whereas
 the
second
 major trend
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
showed
Wrong verb form
shown
show examples
 by
people
 using LRT with
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
35%.
On the other hand
, Bus and Taxi were both used
10
Change preposition
for 10
show examples
% of the total
travel
 which was much lesser than the
use
 of the other two. Among the
reasons
 for using cars in the
city
, more than
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half
people
Change preposition
of people
show examples
use
car
Add an article
the car
a car
show examples
 for getting to
work
.the
second
 highest percentage of
people
 used for
businees
Correct your spelling
business
businesses
 aim which was 10% less than
work
 commuting
reason
. For taking children to school 40% of
people
 travelled and shopping and leisure activities
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 another
reason
people
 travelled which was 40% of their total
travel
.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "furthermore, on the other hand, whereas".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, use, reasons, city, half, people, car, work, second, travel, reason with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "provides" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "illustrates" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "provides" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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