Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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In the current modern world, some
of
Change preposition
apply
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kids display a tendency to put a considerable amount of their daily time into working with their smartphones.
This
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essay will shed light on some causes that have led to
this
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widespread trend among new generation members and
also
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will indicate the writer’s opinion about
this
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negative development. In
this
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technology era, individuals can do a wide range of activities and work by using their cell phones and children
also
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are not exempt from
this
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trend. So, these days they can read their favourite books and novels on their digital equipment, they can play online games with their friends with these modern tools plus they can watch the movies that they like on them
while
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about 20 years ago, the previous generations had to take a part in all of the mentioned activities in the real world and they just could call other people by their mobile phones.
Therefore
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, these days the amount of time that children allocate to use their smartphones has significantly increased. From my perspective,
this
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growing trend that modern lifestyle necessitates the later generations of human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
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to do it will have harmful and irreparable effects on humans’ organs’ functions and health.
For instance
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,
it is clear that
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when children gaze at these digital screens for a long time to do different things based on warnings of
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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field experts that are being heard every day from dissimilar information sources, gradually their eyesight will
be deteriorated
Change to the active voice
deteriorate
have deteriorated
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.
To sum up
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, the kids of the technology century will intend to devote a large part of their days to utilising their smartphones
due to
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this
Correct determiner usage
the
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fact that they face a wide range of work that they can do with their phones and from my perspective
this
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dangerous habit will cause severe health problems for them in the future.
Submitted by m.v.g1371 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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