Some people believe that music should be taught in schools, while others think that it is best to focus on computer and science. Discuss both views and your opinion.

#people #music #schools #focus #computer #science

In recent years, teaching computers and science at school has become a noticeable subject

due to

the influence of developing technology at present.

On the other hand

, the opinion that

students

should learn about

music

also

still supported by many

people

This

essay will discuss both viewpoints, and I personally believe that schools ought to offer more computer science classes.

To begin

with, it is certainly true that

music

entertains the human mind. Researchers have confirmed that a life with

music

provides more satisfaction than a life without it.

Therefore

, young

people

should engage with

music

such

as playing the guitar or piano, during their youth.

Moreover

, the experience of playing instruments can serve as a positive influence on young

people

's hobbies in the future, as hobbies consistently have a positive effect on individuals. Having said that, schools facing a lack of subjects related to computer technology could jeopardise

students

' futures. Upon graduating from high school, individuals are inevitably required to use computers in various situations.

For instance

, when tackling assignments at university,

students

need knowledge of software like "Word" or "Excel".

Furthermore

, in

this

digital era, the majority of

people

utilise the Internet for online shopping and subscribing to various services.

Therefore

, it is crucial for

students

to receive education in internet literacy to avoid falling prey to fake emails or phishing scams. In conclusion,

while

learning

music

is undoubtedly a valuable experience for young

people

, becoming familiar with computers is a significant skill in today's contemporary times.

Submitted by songcheng619 on Wed Aug 02 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

250 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that music should be taught in schools, while others think that it is best to focus on computer and science. Discuss both views and your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that professional, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in any country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Q. Cases of bullying in school are increasing and worsening. What do you think are the cause of this? How can we tackle this issue?

in some cultures, childeren are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Anyone can use a mobile phone to answer the work call and home call at any place, or 7 days a week. Do you think there are more negative or positive effects on both individuals and society?

Research indicates that nowadays some consumers are much less influenced by advertising than in the past. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?