Some believe that it is beneficial to show foreign films while others feel this can have a negative impact on local culture. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It has been a point of contention as to whether it would be advantageous for local cultures to allow international
films
to be shown.
While
restricting foreign
films
can
result
in the growth of domestic
cinema
due to
the formation of a monopoly in the industry, I would argue that it might be cruel to deprive citizens of cinematic masterpieces merely to let the
business
rise. Those who point out the benefits of restricting foreign
films
from being displayed in the community often argue that the existence of international movies
such
as Hollywood blockbuster franchises, Oscar-nominated
films
, or critic-recommended pictures, gives domestic productions no opportunity to grow especially because film lovers tend to prefer these highly appreciated brands over locally generated unknown movies. Take China
for instance
, where the authorities opted to constrain the flow of foreign
films
so that their domestic
cinema
could be empowered.
Consequently
, the Chinese movie
business
took advantage of the situation to gain profit and success.
Hence
, limiting citizens from watching international
cinema
could lead to progress in the local cinematic industry.
However
, I believe that confining foreign
cinema
has adverse effects on local culture.
Firstly
it can create a monopoly in
this
business
and
as a
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
the quality of the
products
will eventually decline.
This
is because in spite of some initial progress for local filmmakers
as a
result
of these assigned limitations, a few corporations will come on top and prevent competition in the field.
This
lack of competition will eventually manifest in the form of low-quality
products
.
Secondly
, putting constraints on the citizen's rights to see any movie they want can
result
in the discouragement of the local community from following domestic
products
and lead to the illegal download of international
films
.
Hence
, depriving people of foreign
films
can
result
in following non-domestic
products
in an illegal way. In conclusion,
although
imposing restrictions on foreign movies can make local
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
show examples
grow substantially,
this
limitation can eventually
result
in either local producers making
films
with low quality and content because of no challenges, or people’s disappointment which would lead to illegal possession of international
films
.
Submitted by sajadtorab on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph directly relates to the topic and supports the main argument. Use clear linking words to connect ideas and improve coherence and cohesion.
task response
Be sure to address all aspects of the essay prompt, including discussing both views and presenting a clear opinion on the topic. Use specific examples to support your points and provide a thorough discussion of the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: