It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #risks #lives

I believe that it is necessary to take some risks coming from the professional career and their personal lives. I will talk about why the advantages outweigh the disadvantages in detail. First of all, it is undeniable that a person who takes risks in the professional field is likely to earn more money rather than those who stay stable at the workplace.

According to

statics by the University of British Columbia, an entrepreneur’s salary is double or even triple

than

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Moreover

, the risk-takers can foster self-esteem and self-confidence as they always try to challenge adventures and struggle to defeat the difficulties that followed.

As a result

, they can improve their abilities and broaden their perspectives on their lives.

In addition

to personal careers, taking risks in their personal life allows them to flourish in their lives. One best example is having a baby. I believe that having a baby is a life-changing choice. It means that a couple who decide to have a child should be brave as looking after a child requires plenty of resources and sacrifice.

However

, the happiness coming from kids outweighs the distress and hardships of taking care of a child.

As a result

, life-changing decisions which they choose allow them a well-being life. In conclusion, I believe that the advantages of taking challenges overpass their disadvantages because it allows their abilities to develop and to make their life pleasant

Submitted by mirae.han316 on Thu Aug 03 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

237 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

The role of education is to prepare children for the modern world. Schools should cut subjects such as arts and music out of the curriculum so that children can focus on subject such as information and technology. To what extend do you agree?

In some countries, the number of shootings increase because many people have guns at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.