It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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I believe that it is necessary to take some risks coming from the professional career and their personal lives. I will talk about why the advantages outweigh the disadvantages in detail. First of all, it is undeniable that a person who takes risks in the professional field is likely to earn more money rather than those who stay stable at the workplace.

According to

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statics by the University of British Columbia, an entrepreneur’s salary is double or even triple

than

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that

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of a

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office

worker’s

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worker

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Moreover

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, the risk-takers can foster self-esteem and self-confidence as they always try to challenge adventures and struggle to defeat the difficulties that followed.

As a result

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, they can improve their abilities and broaden their perspectives on their lives.

In addition

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to personal careers, taking risks in their personal life allows them to flourish in their lives. One best example is having a baby. I believe that having a baby is a life-changing choice. It means that a couple who decide to have a child should be brave as looking after a child requires plenty of resources and sacrifice.

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, the happiness coming from kids outweighs the distress and hardships of taking care of a child.

As a result

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, life-changing decisions which they choose allow them a well-being life. In conclusion, I believe that the advantages of taking challenges overpass their disadvantages because it allows their abilities to develop and to make their life pleasant

Submitted by mirae.han316 on Thu Aug 03 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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5
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

237 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Opportunities
Growth
Innovation
Challenges
Self-discovery
Resilience
Uncertainty
Consequences
Calculated risks
Stagnation
Regret
Comfort zone
Entrepreneurship
Adventurous spirit
Thriving
Failure
Mitigate
Reap the rewards

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It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

It more important for school children to learn local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write a letter to a city planning manager about demolition of a historical building in your area and say – Explain why it shouldn’t be demolished. – Suggest a future use for this building. – Recommend a way to raise money for repairs.

Some countries have free health services. However, some people feel that those who live unhealthy lifestyles should not receive free healthcare. Do you agree or disagree with this view?

In light of the current socio-economic situation of the world, do you think this the right time for wild life preservation? If yes, what are the ways and means you suggest for this?