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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

People should look after their health as a duty to the society where they live, rather than for their own benefits. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #health #duty #society
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It is true that some
people
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 think we should be responsible for taking care of our own
health
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 as a duty to society,
whereas
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 others consider that maintaining our fitness is just for our own good. Personally, I believe that both criteria should be given equal consideration. On the one hand, if we underestimate the importance of having good
health
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, it might create a burden on the community. To be more specific, having an unhealthy
body
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 might lead to a variety of diseases, and
people
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 need to go to the hospital for treatment which sometimes occupies a lot of social resources, especially in countries that provide great social welfare.
People
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 might need to pay more tax
due to
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 the problems mentioned above.
On the other hand
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, we can get several benefits by maintaining a healthy
body
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. First of all,
people
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 who have good
health
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 do not need medication and they could save a lot of money.
Secondly
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, with a healthy
body
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,
people
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 could be more productive at work which is definitely an essential factor in one’s career.
Last
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 but not least, when we talk about well-being, it is not only physical but
also
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 mental. Lots of research has shown the importance of our mental
health
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.
People
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 with great mental
health
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 could live a longer and more positive life. In conclusion,
while
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 taking good care of one’s
health
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 could regard as a duty to the society where we live, it could
also
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 help
people
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 to improve their life quality. So it’s a win-win situation to maintain a healthy
body
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 for all of us.
Submitted by chiachen1999 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • duty
  • well-being
  • burden
  • healthcare systems
  • productive
  • economy
  • example
  • empower
  • informed choices
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