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Band 7.5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#aim #science #people’s #lives
Many have known about the impacts
science
 has on the globe’s living quality, yet there are two divided ideas toward how actually beneficial
science
 is. From individuals with thoughts of positive effects to a total opposite. I, myself, pay complete agreement with the first opinion. As there are a great variety of pros that have been providing our humanity for decades, in various fields. On the one hand, the advantages that
science
 has brought human beings are considered most affected in medical-related areas.
This
 thinking initiates from successes or achievements.
For example
,
anesthesia
Change the spelling
anaesthesia
show examples
 helps patients feel less pain in the middle of operations, or another helpful brainchild in
this
 industry, vaccines, which obviously
as a result
, help millions of citizens stay away from loads of deadly ailments, and the list
continues
Change the verb form
continue
show examples
. On the plus side, technology is definitely regarded as the greatest branch of
science
,
due to
 a number of conveniences that are injected into each of our lives. From getting speedy access to information to the capacity to connect with friends and family from afar,
this
 tool has always been one of the best companions that increases our opportunities for an easier lifestyle.
However
, everything still has its own dark sides. In spite of all the mentioned benefits, multiple drawbacks still exist in terms of
science
.
Firstly
,
science
 in general tends to create more contamination and leads to many green issues like air pollution, poorer water quality, and glacial thawing,… these phenomena are the result of inventions that utilize fuels or contain non-biodegraded materials.
Secondly
, technological devices, which normally supply us with too much comfort.
Hence
, it will help contribute to bad habits, laziness, and an unhealthy way of living. Of course,
this
 depends on owners of those comfortable sources, yet I believe it is more likely to play the role of a tempting element. In brief,
science
, similar to other fields, has both good sides and downturns.
Nonetheless
, from my perspective, the pros seemingly exceed the negative points since it gives out an array of choices and chances in varied areas, rather than just a few main well-known negative aspects that have to do with environmental matters and detrimental effects on human’s daily health.
Submitted by jakelong16091994 on

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Structure
Ensure your essay has a clear and consistent structure, utilizing paragraphing to separate distinct ideas effectively.
Cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
Content
To enhance task achievement, continue to provide concrete examples and elaborate on these to fully support your arguments.
Introduction/Conclusion
Work on refining your introductions and conclusions to succinctly summarize the main points and your stance, ensuring they are clear and impactful.
Content
You have done an excellent job in supporting your main points with relevant and specific examples.
Structure
Your essay demonstrates a good logical structure, making it easy to follow your arguments.
Content
The inclusion of detailed examples provides a strong support for your arguments, showcasing thorough understanding and engagement with the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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