At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

It is a fact that, nowadays, the number of young

adults

is more than older

people

in some countries. In my opinion, the benefits of

this

phenomenon outweigh the drawbacks. There are many advantages for countries that have more young

people

than older

people

Firstly

, older

people

compared with young

people

do not have adequate energy to do work.

For example

, in some jobs that require physical activity

such

as oil workers, staff must work physically for eight hours, so older

people

cannot do

such

work efficiently.

Secondly

, young

people

are fast learners because their brain is highly capable of learning new things in less time.

However

, older

people

have spent more time learning.

Finally

, young

adults

have great motivation to explore new things and prove themselves to everyone,

while

older

people

are not as motivated as younger ones to achieve new objectives.

On the other hand

, there are some disadvantages for societies in that the number of older

people

is less than younger

adults

. One of the most important aspects is that older

people

have great experience in many fields

such

as business.

In contrast

, the rate of error in the younger generation is high because they do not have enough experience to deal with some difficulties. Another aspect is that young

people

may not be capable of seeing problems from different views, so they might make some decisions that have irreversible implications. In conclusion, in some

countries

Add a comma

,countries

show examples

the population of older

people

is less than young

adults

This

situation has some negative and positive effects. In my point of view, positive effects are more significant than negative effects.

Submitted by shahab_e2020 on Sat Aug 05 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

270 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, while others think celebrities make the problems less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion. agree = followers, lovers, copy disagree = skip, do not care

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.