Some people believe that mobile phones must be banned in public places such as libraries, shops or public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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In recent years, mobile
phones
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have become an integral part of everyday life.
While
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some people argue that their
use
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should be prohibited in public places
such
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as libraries, shops, and public transport, I strongly disagree with
this
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viewpoint.
This
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is because mobile devices are indispensable for communication and personal safety;
furthermore
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, more practical and balanced alternatives exist than enforcing a complete ban.
To begin
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with, mobile
phones
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play a vital role in facilitating efficient communication and enhancing individual safety.
In particular
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, people rely on smartphones to maintain constant contact with family, friends, and colleagues, especially in urgent circumstances.
For instance
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, a commuter may need to notify their employer about a delay or inform a family member of a change in plans.
Additionally
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, in emergency situations
such
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as accidents or sudden medical issues, mobile
phones
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enable individuals to contact emergency services without delay.
Consequently
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,
this
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immediate access to assistance can minimise the severity of incidents and, in some cases, even save lives.
Therefore
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, imposing a total ban on mobile
phones
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could lead to unnecessary risks and inconvenience.
Moreover
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, rather than implementing a blanket prohibition, more effective measures can be adopted to reduce disturbances in public spaces.
For example
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, many locations
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such
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, such
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as libraries
already
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, already
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encourage individuals to switch their devices to silent mode;
as a result
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, users can receive notifications without causing noise disruption.
Similarly
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, designated areas for phone usage can be introduced in settings like shopping centres or transport hubs, allowing people to
use
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their devices without inconveniencing others.
For instance
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, quiet carriages on trains often restrict phone conversations
while
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still permitting general device
use
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.
Thus
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, these practical solutions help strike a balance between maintaining a peaceful environment and accommodating individual needs. In conclusion,
although
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the
use
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of mobile
phones
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in public spaces may occasionally cause inconvenience, a complete ban is neither necessary nor justified.
Overall
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, smartphones remain essential tools for communication and safety;
therefore
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, alternative approaches
such
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as silent modes and designated usage areas should be prioritised over restrictive regulations.

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task response
Make your side even more clear in each body part. This will make your answer stronger.
task response
Add one more very clear real world example to make your ideas feel more full.
coherence and cohesion
Some link words are very good, but a few parts sound a bit formal. Try to keep the flow more natural.
coherence and cohesion
Your ideas are well ordered, but you can make one or two topic sentences shorter and more direct.
task response
You answer the question fully and your opinion is clear from start to end.
coherence and cohesion
Your main ideas are easy to follow and each paragraph has a clear job.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear opening and a strong ending.
task response
You use examples that match your points well.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Distraction
  • Etiquette
  • Tranquility
  • Prohibit
  • Intrusive
  • Courtesy
  • Essential communication
  • Public decorum
  • Designated areas
  • Safety concerns
  • Noise pollution
  • Digital etiquette
  • Enforcement measures
  • Civic responsibility
  • Silent mode
  • Connectivity
  • Invasiveness
  • Social norms
  • Policy implementation
  • Moderation
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