IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use.

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
Linking Words
 chart shows the
energy
Use synonyms
comsuption
Correct your spelling
consumption
 of an average Australian household and how
propotion
Correct your spelling
proportion
promotion
 of emitting
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
 in each type of
active
Replace the word
activity
show examples
.
First,
Linking Words
the most bigger different
informations
Change the wording
pieces of information
show examples
 are using heating and other appliances, relate to 42% and 15%, but they going
up side
Correct your spelling
upside
show examples
 down in
gas
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
emittions
Correct your spelling
emissions
, which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 15% and 28%.
Secondly
Linking Words
, using
energy
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 lighting and refrigeration are similar
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
show examples
 in
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
emittions
Correct your spelling
emissions
. The former
using
Wrong verb form
uses
show examples
 4% and produce
double
Change the article
a double
the double
show examples
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
emittions
Correct your spelling
emissions
 to 8%. The latter
energy
Use synonyms
 have the same situation about 7%
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
using
energy
Use synonyms
 but emit 14%
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
. The
last
Linking Words
 two parts of things are water heating which is
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
 large source of
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 using
energy
Use synonyms
 and the smallest
cumsuming
Correct your spelling
consuming
energy
Use synonyms
 one = cooling. Indeed, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 just a
marginally
Change the word
marginal
show examples
 change in
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
emittions
Correct your spelling
emissions
 which, grow from 30% to 32% and rise from 2% to 3%.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, greenhouse, gas, emittions with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Energy consumption
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Sustainable practices
  • Energy efficiency
  • Renewable energy
  • Fossil fuels
  • Carbon footprint
  • Eco-friendly appliances
  • Insulation
  • Solar panels
  • Recycling
  • Climate change
  • Kilowatt-hour (kWh)
  • Emissions-intensive
  • Energy audit
  • Smart meters
What to do next:
Look at other essays: