In many countries,the government likes to spend more money on the arts .some people agree with this.However,other think the government should spend more money on health and education.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#countries #government #money #arts #people #health #education

There are several causative factors which depict that government should

Add a missing verb

be more

show examples

incline towards

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

art

in terms of funding.

Initially

art

has been continuously depleting entertainment

source

Fix the agreement mistake

sources

show examples

This

because

Add the preposition

ofbecause

show examples

the fact that artists are not generating more handcrafted

art work

Correct your spelling

artwork

show examples

due to

insufficient earnings.

For instance

, in India, the number of ceramists have been decreased as the buyers are not rendering them their desired amount of money.

Additionally

art

is highly advantageous for boosting the economic status of a nation.

Therefore

, ministers should extend their helping hands by providing raw materials and by establishing museums to exhibit the arts. To exemplify it, in Canada, on weekends, the majority of citizens visit the

governemnt

Correct your spelling

government

run museum to see new forms of

art

by paying the entry tickets.

Submitted by rajwinder85913 on Mon Aug 07 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

127 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
You want to sell your laptop. You think a friend of yours might like to to buy it from you. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: Explain why you are selling the laptop Discribe the laptop Suggest a date when your friend can come and see it
I am just writing this letter to you if you are interested in buying my laptop. because I want to sell it.As you know it has not taken too much time that I bought it . Yet unfortunately I have to sell it because I am enrolled in a new course at Stanford University which has too many high expenses .
7.5
band
You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for 6 months and look after their 6-year-old child. write a letter to the parents in your letter explain: why you would like the job give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia
I am writing to inform you that I am interested in the position which you have published in the magazine about the Nanny job for your son.
5.5
band
Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil, or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?
In this present world, there is a surging trend that more and more people are not used to handwriting with tools. This essay shall explore the causes behind this change before concluding that this is a positive rather than negative development.
6
band
The media pay too much attention to the lives and relationships of celebrities such as actors, singers or footballer. They should spend more time reporting the lives of ordinary people instead.
Nowadays, more and more celebrities make a lot of people interested in them. As a result, the lives and personalities of renowned people like actors, musicians, and football players receive increased attention through printing or broadcasting. I, like many others, hold the notion that the mass media should pay too much attention to the lives of the working class, which will be closely discussed as follows.
7.5
band
You are studying a short course in another country. Your accommodation was arranged by the course provider. There is a major problem with accommodation. Write a letter to the course provider. In your letter: say what the problem is describe the accommodation you thought you were getting ask the provider to solve the problem
I am writing this letter regarding the accommodation provided for me at Kent street which is far from my university, as my course duration is only 6 months so I am not willing to buy any car and it is a new place for me.

In many countries,the government likes to spend more money on the arts .some people agree with this.However,other think the government should spend more money on health and education.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

You want to sell your laptop. You think a friend of yours might like to to buy it from you. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: Explain why you are selling the laptop Discribe the laptop Suggest a date when your friend can come and see it

Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil, or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

The media pay too much attention to the lives and relationships of celebrities such as actors, singers or footballer. They should spend more time reporting the lives of ordinary people instead.