Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

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It’s considered that
easiest
Correct article usage
the easiest
show examples
method to reduce the amount of consumed sugar
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
contains
Wrong verb form
contained
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in food and beverages is increasing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the level of
prices
Use synonyms
for
such
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products. I completely disagree with
this
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opinion and suppose that teaching people, especially the young generation, about
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
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diet is the more effective way. First of all, I believe that the rise
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
prices
Use synonyms
causes more revenue for the companies, which produce sugar-containing goods, to a greater extent, and, to a much lesser, lead to
stop
Correct article usage
a stop
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or decrease consumption of sugary food and drink.
For example
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,
the
Correct article usage
a
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similar situation is occurring in
area
Add an article
the area
an area
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of tobacco sales in Uzbekistan. Through the decades the cost of cigarettes has been rising, and it increased twice only in
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
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two years. Meanwhile, the
percent
Replace the word
percentage
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of smokers grew from 9 to 16
at
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in
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the same period
according to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
data
of
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from
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World
Correct article usage
the World
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Health Organization.
That is
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why it is more important to choose
the
Correct article usage
a
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complex way that makes
clear
Correct article usage
a clear
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understanding for
consumer
Fix the agreement mistake
consumers
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about harmful
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
for
Change preposition
on
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their health than to look only at the increasing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
costs.
Secondly
Linking Words
, high
prices
Use synonyms
can take a serious hit on the wallet of individuals with
low
Add an article
a low
the low
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level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
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of income,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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, in its turn, may lead not to encourage
population
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the population
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to refuse
from
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apply
show examples
sweets
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but to look for cheaper and poor-quality goods. As
result
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
,
such
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type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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of substitutes can damage
individual’s
Correct article usage
an individual’s
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health much more.
To conclude
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, I strongly believe that
wide-spread
Correct your spelling
widespread
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knowledge among
population
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the population
show examples
about how our bodies work and which nutrition is useful for them is more beneficial than the
growing
Replace the word
growth
show examples
of
prices
Use synonyms
because it makes people motivated, despite the fact that
this
Linking Words
path is longer, but ultimately it is more powerful in solving the problem to reduce sugar consuming.
Submitted by alexander.vectorgs on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • health problems
  • manufactured food and drink products
  • sugary products
  • excessive sugar consumption
  • discourage
  • promote
  • healthier choices
  • reduce
  • increased taxes
  • fund
  • health education
  • prevention programs
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