IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The
line
Use synonyms
 chart illustrates the number of closures and opening
shops
Use synonyms
 in a country from 2011 to 2016.
Overall
Linking Words
, there is an insignificant fluctuation in the
line
Use synonyms
 of closed
shops
Use synonyms
 in 2015, the opened
shops
Use synonyms
line
Use synonyms
 was about to decrease over the period, and its figure did not change dramatically. On the Closure
line
Use synonyms
, it has remained balanced in the number of
shops
Use synonyms
 from when it started in 2011 until 2014 passed, decreasing rapidly and jumping up in 2016. After that, the figure was recorded stay about 5000 to above. On the opposite side, The Openings dropped in the first years, but over time for 2 years 2012 to 2014. It slightly increases from under 4000 to 6100 and continues to drop by 2000
shops
Use synonyms
 in 2015. Stay in above 4000 and the figures
finally
Linking Words
 ended at point 3000

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words line, shops with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • retail landscape
  • net growth
  • market dynamics
  • economic indicators
  • fluctuations
  • pivotal
  • consumption patterns
  • e-commerce
  • brick-and-mortar
  • downward/upward trend
  • stabilize
  • recession
  • boom
  • retail sector
  • closure rate
  • inauguration/opening rate
  • consumer market
  • saturate
  • commercial viability
  • profitability
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