People try new dangerous sports such as sky-diving or rock climbing. Should such sports be banned?

#people #sports #rock

In recent years we have seen a considerable rise in dangerous or extreme

sports

Although

I do not support an outright ban on

such

sports

, I do feel that the government should regulate

such

sports

so that they are played under supervision which will minimize the risks. It is irrefutable that dangerous or extreme

sports

can cause injury or even death to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

individuals.

However

, banning

such

sports

is not the answer.

Instead

, the government should ensure that the companies or centres which provide the facilities for

such

sports

should meet the required, legal safety standards. Another argument against banning is that

then

people would play them in hiding and

then

they would be even more risky. After

all

Add a comma

,all

show examples

we all know that forbidden fruits taste sweeter.

Furthermore

, if

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

bans

such

sports

, it could be viewed as an infringement of the rights. Those who choose to participate in these

sports

know the consequences. They know very well what is good or bad for them. They argue that if

such

sports

are banned,

then

all those other things that are harmful

for

Change the preposition

show examples

individuals should be banned like smoking, drinking and eating fast foods. What is more, those sportsmen who excel in

such

sports

bring name and fame to their country. They break records set by others and when they do so, the name of their country shines in the whole world. To put it in a nutshell, I pen down saying that,

such

sports

should be performed after sufficient training and under

supervision

Correct article usage

the supervision

show examples

of experts. Dangerous

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

companies should require a license for providing

such

training. To lay a ban on

such

sports

is not the answer.

Submitted by harshtrivedi78 on Wed Aug 09 2023

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

277 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People try new dangerous sports such as sky-diving or rock climbing. Should such sports be banned?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Although some people believe that children should pursue employment, others think that students should study further education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.