IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

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Nowadays,
still
Add a comma
,still
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 many human beings pass away in poor nations, since for them the prices of medicines are too high. I share the view that
companies
Use synonyms
 which produce and provide drugs should decrease their prices and allow men and women around the world to have the chance to take care
about
Change preposition
of
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 their health. There are several reasons for believing that drug corporations should make efforts to help people in poor countries. First of all,
Linking Words
this kind
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these kinds
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 of factories earn a lot of money thanks to developed nations. Indeed, generally, in these
places
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,places
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 human beings spend a lot of money on all
kind
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kinds
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 of medicine, even for a simple flu.
For
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this
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 reason,
companies
Use synonyms
 should reduce the price of their products without any problem.
Secondly
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, nowadays,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
corporate social responsibility has become an essential milestone in our society.
In other words
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,
companies
Use synonyms
 must be aware that people and governments pay attention to it,
thus
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 they should do something to help their workers, communities or the environment.
For instance
Linking Words
, in
this
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 case, corporations could donate medicines to Africa or other regions around the world. A good example, was during the covid,
that
Correct word choice
when
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 someone provides vaccines and drugs for these people.
Last
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 but not least, it is unfair that if you
born
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are born
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 in a poor region you cannot have the same opportunities
like
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as
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 if you grow up in
western
Capitalize word
Western
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 Europe or in the USA. In conclusion, I believe that drug
companies
Use synonyms
 should not only focus on increasing their profits
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
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 be socially responsible. In brief, the effort that they should make
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is not so harsh, but they can save a huge number of lives.

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pharmaceuticals
  • Generic drugs
  • Patent laws
  • Healthcare disparity
  • Subsidies
  • Non-Governmental Organizations (NGOs)
  • Intellectual property
  • Epidemiology
  • Affordability
  • Global health initiatives
  • Corporate social responsibility
What to do next:
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