IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowadays, there is a trend that reports of media focus on problems and emergencies rather than positive development. Some people think it is harmful to individuals and to society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the contemporary world of globalization, It is noticeable these days that media is more focused on issues rather than positive
news
Use synonyms
. Some people argue that it is dangerous for viewers.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the issues with
this
Linking Words
 recent development and why I agree with the notion. First of all,
News
Use synonyms
 channels have
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 power to influence their viewers' perspectives,
as a result
Linking Words
, if they only show negative
news
Use synonyms
, their viewers might believe that there is no positive
news
Use synonyms
 which may lead to brain drain.
For instance
Linking Words
 in Pakistan, when local TV channels only highlight problems and emergencies
such
Linking Words
 as street crimes, terrorist attacks,
economic
Correct word choice
and economic
show examples
 challenges, even though the
country
Use synonyms
 has other delightful developments as well.
For example
Linking Words
,a Pakistani athlete wins a gold medal in the Olympics, a female mountaineer has summit 8 highest peaks etc. Youth don't feel secure and try migrating to a
country
Use synonyms
 where there is a promising future.
Therefore
Linking Words
, approximately 700,000 students and professionals fled the
country
Use synonyms
last
Linking Words
 year.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
Although
Linking Words
 the media is not only watched locally but internationally as well, Foreigners might think several times before travelling to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
country
Use synonyms
 where security is at risk.
This
Linking Words
 will not only affect the image internationally but negatively impact tourism.
For example
Linking Words
, Pakistan's northern area is one of the best tourist spots, especially Malam Jabba, where many individuals arrive for winter sports from all over the world. Since local media is not positive about the
country
Use synonyms
's basic security, how will it attract more people
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Hence
Linking Words
, these channels play a vital role in creating an image of a
country
Use synonyms
. To summarize, reporting on positive developments is far more important than covering negative aspects , since these can cause serious concerns among local and international communities.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure clarity and flow between paragraphs; use more varied linking words.
task achievement
Expand on counterarguments to present a balanced view.
task achievement
You present a clear position and elaborate on it with relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-structured, providing a good frame for your argument.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: