The diagram below shows the life cycle of a species of large fish called salmon

The diagram below shows the life cycle of a species of large fish called salmon
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The charts illustrate the life cycle of the salmon which is a large fish species.
Overall
Linking Words
, the single life cycle takes nine years to complete including four main stages: eggs,
fry
Use synonyms
, smolts, and adult salmon.
However
Linking Words
, the first three steps occur in the fresh water and the
last
Linking Words
takes place in the sea.
First,
Linking Words
the adult salmon are laid their eggs among small stones at the base of reeds in the upper river where the current is slowly moving.
Then
Linking Words
, the
fry
Use synonyms
can be seen after five to six months approximately and they are 3-8 cm long.
Next,
Linking Words
these
fry
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swim to the lower river which has fast flowing current and
fry
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take 4 years period to become
smolt
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. The
smolt
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measure 12-15 cm roughly.
Finally
Linking Words
,
smolt
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heads to the open sea and they have grown into adult
smolt
Use synonyms
70-76 cm long when taking 5 years approximately. After that, when they reach spawning. they swim to the river and the life cycle repeats all over again.
Submitted by shanikamaduri on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words fry, smolt with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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