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Writing Samples
Band 7

In recent years, television has contributed most to changing people’s quality of life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#years #television #people’s #quality #life
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In the modern age, the invention of television is believed to have impacted the lives of many men and women around the globe. I vehemently disagree with
this
 statement, and I will state my opposing belief in the paragraphs below. The advent of TV has brought about a paradigm shift in the way entertainment is offered to the masses. As
such
, once, when owning a screen was seen as a commodity and a privilege, is now rendered to be the prerogative of many.
Thus
, ever since
then
, it has become an integral part of every household and it has
thus
 seen daily worldwide use. For that reason, it has been upgraded and evolved to a state of excellence, over the span of the
last
 two decades.
However
, the subject device is overtaken by a couple of many superior mediums of entertainment. These machines are
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 the mobile phone and the computer. These aforementioned inventions have been introduced to the market fairly recently. But, the modicum at which they surpass the television is legendary.
Additionally
, both the phone and the PC has been kept up-to-date in terms of technological improvements. Not only do they offer the same features as their predecessors, but they
also
 add more on top of that. Functions
such
 as those that can not be emulated by their opponent.
Moreover
, both of these items are highly portable, offering access to amusements irrespective of the current geographical location. As an example, if a person is travelling by bus, and he or she needs to watch some videos, he or she can easily do so by an object they can carry in their pocket.
To conclude
, the television was considered to be a revolutionary invention once, but alas, it can not keep up with the advancements given to cellular phones and desktop computers any longer. As
such
, it is an inferior choice.
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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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