Some people think that zoos are cruel, and all the zoos should be closed. However, others think that zoos are useful to protect rare animals. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Zoos
for some experts are useless places and should be locked down, but for other
expert’s
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expert
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zoos
are the safest
place
for the
animals
who could
be die
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die
show examples
if they left behind. I am of two minds, on the one hand keeping
animals
in four walls is not fair. and
on the other hand
, it must keep some
animals
safe.
To begin
with, closing
zoos
is something good for
animals
.
Despite of
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apply
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, keeping
animals
inside
shelter
Correct article usage
a shelter
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done
Unnecessary verb
apply
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by human beings may look fancy, but it hurts
animals
by taking their freedom.
for instance
,
put
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putting
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a lion or tiger inside a box to let visitors enjoy,
this
place
will affect the original
behavior
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behaviour
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of these
animals
because they are not in the same environment they used to be.
Also
, sometimes they become out of control because people take them away from their hometown. So that
zoos
should be locked down to let each animal live in their own
place
with their families and stay in its environment.
On the other hand
, keeping
zoos
for
animals
is important, it helps to let living things stay safe.
Earlier
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In earlier
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years some
animals
being
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were
show examples
hunted by people, and
this
effect their exitance
in
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on
show examples
our earth. So, some scientists decide to keep what
left
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is left
show examples
of these
animals
in
zoos
to protect them from being killed. In the north pole
for example
the north bears become less in count, so scientists took some of them and moved these bears to
place
Wrong verb form
places
show examples
same as their hometown, giving them
same
Correct article usage
the same
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food
also
Correct word choice
and also
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provide
Wrong verb form
providing
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them with
nearest
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the nearest
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environment. In conclusion, I believe that in some cases to protect
animals
safely we should provide for them shelters. But in general, it is better to let
animals
live where they should be and keep our earth clean.
Also
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,Also
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it is our responsibility to aware hunters to not kill
animals
in our
plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants
show examples
.
Submitted by shimo95977 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • animal welfare
  • conservation
  • captive breeding
  • habitat
  • ethical issues
  • zoochosis
  • endangered species
  • genetic diversity
  • reintroduction programs
  • wildlife education
  • sanctuary
  • natural living conditions
  • artificial environments
  • behavioral enrichment
  • ecosystem
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