Some people think that zoos are cruel, and all the zoos should be closed. However, others think that zoos are useful to protect rare animals. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Zoos
Use synonyms
for some experts are useless places and should be locked down, but for other
expert’s
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expert
show examples
zoos
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are the safest
place
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for the
animals
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who could
be die
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die
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if they left behind. I am of two minds, on the one hand keeping
animals
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in four walls is not fair. and
on the other hand
Linking Words
, it must keep some
animals
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safe.
To begin
Linking Words
with, closing
zoos
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is something good for
animals
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.
Despite of
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apply
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, keeping
animals
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inside
shelter
Correct article usage
a shelter
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done
Unnecessary verb
apply
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by human beings may look fancy, but it hurts
animals
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by taking their freedom.
for instance
Linking Words
,
put
Wrong verb form
putting
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a lion or tiger inside a box to let visitors enjoy,
this
Linking Words
place
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will affect the original
behavior
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behaviour
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of these
animals
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because they are not in the same environment they used to be.
Also
Linking Words
, sometimes they become out of control because people take them away from their hometown. So that
zoos
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should be locked down to let each animal live in their own
place
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with their families and stay in its environment.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, keeping
zoos
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for
animals
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is important, it helps to let living things stay safe.
Earlier
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In earlier
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years some
animals
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being
Wrong verb form
were
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hunted by people, and
this
Linking Words
effect their exitance
in
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on
show examples
our earth. So, some scientists decide to keep what
left
Add a missing verb
is left
show examples
of these
animals
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in
zoos
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to protect them from being killed. In the north pole
for example
Linking Words
the north bears become less in count, so scientists took some of them and moved these bears to
Use synonyms
place
Wrong verb form
places
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same as their hometown, giving them
same
Correct article usage
the same
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food
Linking Words
also
Correct word choice
and also
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provide
Wrong verb form
providing
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them with
nearest
Change the article
the nearest
show examples
environment. In conclusion, I believe that in some cases to protect
animals
Use synonyms
safely we should provide for them shelters. But in general, it is better to let
animals
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live where they should be and keep our earth clean.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
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it is our responsibility to aware hunters to not kill
animals
Use synonyms
in our
plant
Fix the agreement mistake
plants
show examples
.
Submitted by shimo95977 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • animal welfare
  • conservation
  • captive breeding
  • habitat
  • ethical issues
  • zoochosis
  • endangered species
  • genetic diversity
  • reintroduction programs
  • wildlife education
  • sanctuary
  • natural living conditions
  • artificial environments
  • behavioral enrichment
  • ecosystem
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