Some people say History is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today's world, subjects like Science and Technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
There is an ongoing argument about the importance of varied subjects. Some individuals argue that schools should mainly focus on
History
. However
, others believe that other curriculums like Tech and Science
have the highest priority. I strongly believe all subjects have the same value because the combination of all sciences can hone lives.
First of all, it is compulsory that everyone should have information about their past to discover their identity. For instance
, I should have knowledge about my country’s history
as an Iranian. Because I live in a Persian country which has distinct traditional ceremonies and holidays and eventually if I want to celebrate it like my other fellow citizens, I must know what is the background of all these traditions. Secondly
, Knowing about our history
helps us to discover our price and status. Moreover
, all of us have specific unique histories that make us precious. In particular
, as an Iranian, I am proud and valuable because Iran had an extraordinary history
and it was one of the biggest empires, which was Hakhamaneshian, in the world which should make every Iranian proud.
On the other hand
, History
can be a part of our syllabus but not the majority. The world is moving forward and we are going to be the future smart humans. People can not reside with Conventional methods over time. In addition
, it is mandatory that people specifically students should study technology and science
to enrich our lives. Furthermore
, there are many new diseases such
as “Coronavirus” that science
and innovations can help us defeat them. For example
, if we just knew about history
and not about science
in the period that the coronavirus spread out, we never been able to stave off it.
In conclusion, I am of the opinion that the information about our history
and future can lead us toward advanced life. If we do not know about our past we never will be able to be informed about our identity and value and also
, if we do not know about science
and technology we can not enhance the quality of our lives.Submitted by neginsepahvand on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally well-structured, and you have an introduction and a conclusion, which is excellent. However, some sentences can be a bit clearer. For example, 'Because I live in a Persian country which has distinct traditional ceremonies and holidays and eventually if I want to celebrate it like my other fellow citizens, I must know what is the background of all these traditions.' This sentence can be broken down into two for better clarity.
task achievement
You have addressed both views and provided your own opinion, which fulfills the task requirement. However, try to elaborate more on some points, such as how science and technology can specifically enhance our lives beyond just defeating diseases.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, helping to frame your argument effectively.
task achievement
You have addressed both views on the topic and provided a balanced discussion.