The crime rate has increased dramatically in many countries. Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions to this problem

#crime #rate #countries

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There are significant increases in

Crime

rates in many nations. Lacking

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

fundamental

education

and the problem of accessing

job

opportunities

are the main cause of

this

issue. Not only government must tackle

this

problem, but

also

individuals

in societies. On the one hand, The main reason leading to

crime

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

is the lacking of fundamental and effective

education

because if

citizens

can not access

education

resources, they may lack sufficient knowledge to gain

opportunities

workplace

Add an article

the workplace

show examples

Therefore

, Lacking

job

opportunities

lead to money problems. When

individuals

can not afford to pay their life expenses in order to provide their food or houses, It can lead to

crime

problems

such

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

theft and murder to steal someone else’s property. On the one hand, to tackle these issues authorities should provide their people in terms of accessing equally free

education

to share the right knowledge

since

Change preposition

from

show examples

they were born to finish high school ,and they should help their

citizens

by providing some subsidize to people who can not afford

job

opportunities

,and they may provide some courses to

job

seeker to learn new useful skills or programs to gain chances when they need to find a

job

Moreover

, the government should announce regulations or laws.

For instance

, authorities should increase

crime

punishment to control their

citizens

Finally

individuals

should keep an eye on situations to prevent the

crime

rate in their nations. In conclusion, the

Crime

rate that increasing in many countries

cause

Change the form of the verb

caused

show examples

by a lack of

education

and

job

opportunities

. Governments should provide fundamental

education

without paying ,and more

job

options to their

citizens

also

individuals

can help in terms of caution.

Submitted by chachawrch on Fri Aug 11 2023

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

dramatic increase
economic factors
social inequalities
educational opportunities
glamorization
family structures
community bonds
proliferation
organized crime
ineffective law enforcement
judicial systems
impunity
job creation
vocational training
resilience
rehabilitation
recidivism
media campaigns
preventative measures
deterrent

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