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Band 6.5

The only reason for people working hard is to earn money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#reason #people #money
Some
people
 argue about whether
money
 is the only reason for
people
 to immerse themselves in
work
. In my opinion, other criteria are given equal consideration when talking about working hard. On the
one
 hand,
money
 is
one
 of the most essential parts of
one
’s life, it helps us build a safety zone. To be more specific, financial stability brings a sense of security, which can be liberating.
Moreover
, having more
money
 opens up new opportunities for higher education, career advancements, and travel experiences.
On the other hand
, I believe that there are more reasons for
people
 to pursue a career.
Firstly
, working allow
people
 to absorb new knowledge and learn new skills.
While
 learning continuously at
work
,
people
 are able to catch up with the trend in today’s society.
Secondly
, some
people
 love interacting with
people
, and most jobs involve cooperating and communicating with co-workers, in
this
 case, it is a great choice for
people
 to
work
.
Last
 but not least, working gives
people
 satisfaction.
For example
, after doing a variety of difficult tasks,
people
 might get lots of compliments from their co-workers or even be rewarded by their boss,
people
 tend to be satisfied and more confident about themselves. So in the long term,
this
 might
also
 be
one
 of the things for
people
 to
work
 hard to earn at
work
. In conclusion, even though
money
 is
one
 of the main reasons for
people
 to
work
 hard in their jobs, there are few things that
people
 pursue in their careers.
Submitted by chiachen1999 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Monetary gain
  • Passion-driven
  • Personal fulfillment
  • Career progression
  • Professional development
  • Work-life balance
  • Job satisfaction
  • Societal expectations
  • Cultural values
  • Altruism
  • Positive impact
  • Intrinsic motivation
  • Extrinsic motivation
  • Internal rewards
  • Maslow's hierarchy of needs
  • Psychological aspects
  • Motivational factors
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