In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
There is currently a remarkable rise in the rate of overweight
people
in many nations, whereas
their well-being are
declining. From my standpoint, the reasons for Change the verb form
is
this
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
due to
imbalance
diets and stress that Correct your spelling
imbalanced
people
in recent generations have unconsiously
formed, and there are several solutions for these.
Correct your spelling
unconsciously
To begin
with, people
are losing the ability and awareness to manage the level of sugar
in their diet, especiallly
teenagers. In fact, the young generation Correct your spelling
especially
tend
to favour sweets Change the verb form
tends
such
as chocolates, ice creams, milk
tea, and they are gradually being addicted to them, and Correct word choice
and milk
this
has caused abundance
of Add an article
an abundance
health
issues. For instance
, milk tea is one of the most popular types of drink for youngsters which numerous of
research of many universities in Vietnam reveal to be the major cause of obesity and insomnia as they usually contain excessive Change preposition
apply
amount
of Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
sugar
and caffeine. In addition
, stress is the other problem that should be taken into account due to
the rise in competitiveness. Had it not been the explosion in total
population in many countries, Correct article usage
the total
people
would not have worked harder in order to receive better rewards in their life. However
, this
also
lead
to Change the verb form
leads
the
increase in Correct article usage
an
probability
of keeping a sedentary style which Add an article
the probability
render
Change the verb form
renders
people
to continually consume unhealthy food and rarely do exercises.
On the contrary
, it is still possible to prevent people
from conducting these issues. First off, governments area
Correct your spelling
are
ccountable
for promoting campaigns, especially on Correct your spelling
accountable
the
television podcasts in regard to creating healthy diets Correct article usage
apply
which
the level of Change preposition
in which
sugar
should be cut down. With the national coverage of television programs and the influence of the government, awarenesses will be enhanced in
Change preposition
on
larger
scale. Add an article
a larger
Secondly
, youngsters in particular
and people
in general must prioritize their health
rather than work as well as
encourage each other to keep fitness regularly; therefore
, people
could be able to maintain energetic
and Replace the word
energy
overjoyed
Add a missing verb
be overjoyed
while
lessen
the possibility to be overweight.
Taking Change the verb form
lessening
everthing
into consideration, the main reasons that cause the rise in average weight Correct your spelling
everything
as well as
the fall in health
of Add an article
the health
people
are the overconsumption of sugar
level and the exhaustion of competitiveness among people
. To minimize this
, it is not only essential to gain helps
from the Correct subject-verb agreement
help
goverment
to raise Correct your spelling
government
nationally
awareness of the benefits of Change the adverb
national
balance
diet and Correct article usage
a balance
exercises
but Fix the agreement mistake
exercise
also
each individual is responsible to recognise those as health
is the most crucial asset to preserve.Submitted by zanhduy on
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Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.