People nowadays are not fit and active than the people from the olden days. Discuss the causes for this situation and suggest some possible solutions.

It is certainly true that individuals in present times are not fit and active
than
Change preposition
as
show examples
the
people
from previous generations. In my opinion, there are several reasons for
this
issue including eating unhealthy
food
, and
Correct article usage
a sedentray
show examples
sedentray
Correct your spelling
sedentary
lifestyle
,
however
, I would like to recommend some solutions to tackle
this
problem namely,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
could encourage
people
to eat healthy
food
, and
playing
Wrong verb form
play
show examples
sports. On the one hand, the primary reason why
people
today are not fit is they consume too much fast
food
.
This
is because junk
food
contain
Change the verb form
contains
show examples
too much fat , which
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
people
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
more vulnerable to
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
obese.
Therefore
, if
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
are become
Change to the active voice
become
have become
show examples
obese they become are more likely to get serious diseases namely, cancer, heart attack, and brain stroke. Overusing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
technology
is
major
Add an article
a major
the major
show examples
reason why
people
inactive
Add a missing verb
are inactive
show examples
. To illustrate,
people
today spend a
cosiderable
Correct your spelling
considerable
amount of time in front of
technology
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
computers, and smartphones, which
this
technology
motivate
Correct subject-verb agreement
motivates
show examples
people
to adopt
sedentary
Add an article
a sedentary
show examples
lifestyle
.
In contrast
,
people
in the past adopt
active
Correct article usage
an active
show examples
lifestyle
namely,
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
to
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
, swimming, and playing football.
On the other hand
, I would like to suggest some measures to mitigate
this
issue. The first effective measure,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
could launch educational campaigns in order to raise awareness among the public about
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
negative impacts of eating unhealthy
food
.
Consequently
, after these
campaigns
Add a comma
,campaigns
show examples
people
will become
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
more likely to eat healthy
food
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
vegetables, and
furits
Correct your spelling
fruits
. The second efficient solution,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
could impose taxes on
useage
Correct your spelling
usage
of
technology
in order to discourage
people
to use
technology
too much.
As a result
,
people
will utilize
technology
less , which
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
mean
people
will become
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
more likely to adopt active
lifestyle
such
,
running
Change preposition
as running
show examples
, swimming, and
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
to
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
.
To sum up
, from my perspective, there are different causes why
people
are not fit and active
than
Change preposition
as
show examples
the
people
from the olden days including eating unhealthy
food
, and
inactive
Correct article usage
an inactive
show examples
lifestyle
,
however
, I would
suggeted
Correct your spelling
suggest
some actions to alleviate
this
problem like , authority could incentive
people
to eat healthy
food
, and playing sports.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: