IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

It is better to reform criminals instead of just punishing them. What measures could be taken to attempt to integrate law-breakers back into society?

#reform #criminals #measures #attempt #law-breakers #society
Rehabilitated offenders are much better than imprisoning them. And measures have to be done in order to ensure their integration back into society. In
this
 ,essay I would like to mention the most practical ones.
Firstly
, since criminals experience tough and undesirable situations before and after the execution of the crime and absolutely at
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
prison, with no doubt, they need psychiatric care.
Therefore
, initiating psychological and behavioural therapy is a must as early as possible after they become under arrest. A recent study in the UK concludes that the release of detainees who were willing to have psychiatric care exceed those who were not by 68%.
Furthermore
, authorities have to provide convicts with educational and verbatim programs that ensure that they become productive members of society after release. So hostages have to be supported with resources to learn from
as well as
 having teachers and trainers. In conclusion, some measures must apply in prison to ensure the safety of society and captives themselves after their release. The community and authorities have to cooperate to conduct these measures with the -chief player- the lawbreakers
Submitted by batoolajajba on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: