IELTS essay, topic: Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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It is often argued that a significant number of
museums
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taking
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take
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a
fee
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for the signup process,
while
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some people
believed
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believe
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it should be free of cost. From my point of view, visitors will be more concerned about
museums
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after spending money on entry. Here I would explain why
charges
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are feasible to a certain extent. Primarily, well-known art
museums
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from all across the world are taking a certain amount of money from their visitors;
however
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,
charges
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are not considerably higher.
For example
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, Albert Hall is
an
Correct article usage
apply
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exquisitely known for its ancient artefacts
has
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and has
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an entry
fee
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for tourists and the
museum
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authorities are using the masses' money to maintain the
museum
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by including
security
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the security
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of the art gallery.
Hence
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, paid Halls are well-maintained and tourists are willing to visit over there repeatedly.
Secondly
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, If art galleries
will
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apply
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have an entrance
fee
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, folk who are really interested
to explore
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in exploring
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the halls will visit, whilst non-social elements will avoid going there.
For instance
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, the
Museum
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of France was free to visit for everyone a few years ago, but later, on they started entry
charges
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due to
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a
severeaccident
Correct your spelling
severe accident
which occurred by the commotion of some boisterous lads.
In addition
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, the
museum
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administration found out that they
can
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could
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prevent
such
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those
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apply
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kinds of mishappenings by taking
charges
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from the visitors. Eventually, It worked to a great extent. In conclusion,
museums
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and halls are integral parts of a country's glorious history that uphold ancient things. From my perspective, all
museums
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should have a
little
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small
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fee
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to keep secure them and maintain them for a long time. Ergo, governments and private institutes should take accountability to take care of national properties.
Submitted by nkdharniya on

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task response
The essay partially addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of charging for museum admission, but the ideas are not fully developed. It is recommended to provide more detailed examples and explanations to support the points.
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. It is important to structure the essay with a proper introduction that introduces the topic and a conclusion that summarizes the main points.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Admission fees
  • Revenue generation
  • Facilities
  • Exhibits
  • Maintenance and preservation
  • Artifacts
  • Exclusive exhibitions
  • Temporary exhibitions
  • Overcrowding
  • Equitable access
  • Discounted rates
  • Educational experience
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