In some countries, there are more young people enrolled in work based training instead of attending university. Do the advantage of the situation outweigh the disadvantages.

#countries #people #work #university #advantage #situation

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Nowadays, most university-level students tend to do a job rather than complete their studies.

This

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essay will discuss both views and in my opinion, I believe that

this

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has more benefits than negatives. On the one hand, when the pupils are engaged in a certain job

then

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they could be financially stable.

In other words

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, at the period of joining different, universities they can work

in particular

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interesting fields.

In addition

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, they can secure their career path through certain work and earn money which might eventually fulfil the demands they dreamed of.

For instance

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instead

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of securing degrees, there are rising demands for professional soldiers, plumbing, carpentry and cooking.

Consequently

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,these days their services are becoming more and more expensive.

This

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kind of training is becoming very popular and through pieces of ,training they can maintain their work-life balance.

On the other hand

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, higher university study opens a door to numerous pathways.

For example

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, one of my classmates completed a master's degree in computer science and currently works in one of a well-known international company.

This

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would not

Wrong verb form

have been

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accomplished if he hadn't completed his study.

Moreover

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, highly educated individuals are less likely to be deprived of jobs because they have a certain qualification and quality to adjust themselves in unusual situations.

Thus

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Correct article usage

the Univesity

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Univesity

Correct your spelling

university

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provides more working opportunities.

To conclude

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, I consider that the advantage of a simple training job outweighs its disadvantages.

Although

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higher education is significant, it is impossible for all to achieve academic positions and an opportunity to find suitable jobs.

Submitted by suneel22.sn on Mon Aug 14 2023

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coherence cohesion

The introduction lacks a clear presentation of the writer's opinion and the structure of the essay. The conclusion should be more conclusive and summarize the main points in a better manner.

task achievement

The essay lacks a clear position on whether the advantages of work-based training outweigh the disadvantages. Additionally, there is a need to present a clear opinion in the introduction, and re-evaluating the advantages and disadvantages in the conclusion.

14
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

250 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

work-based training
hands-on experience
tuition fees
career progression
skill gaps
technical expertise
tailored learning
personal growth
extracurricular opportunities
specialized skill set
career adaptability
job market

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In some countries, there are more young people enrolled in work based training instead of attending university. Do the advantage of the situation outweigh the disadvantages.

Some people think that sports involving violence, such as boxing and martial arts, should be banned from TV as well as from international sporting competitions. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries, more and more adults are living with their parents after graduating from college, university or even after finding a job. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantage ?

If an individual acts in an anti-social way, such as committing a crime, who is to be blamed: society or the individual. What causes begin such behaviour? Who should be responsible for this?

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sports or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Older people often choose to spend their money on themselves (e.g., on holiday) rather than save money for their children after retirement. Is this a positive or negative development?