the diagram shows the manufacturing process of making sugar from sugar cane

#process #sugar #cane

The flow chart illustrates the

process

by which

sugar

is made from

sugar

cane.

Overall

, the key point is that

this

is a complex

process

which consists of many stages. These can be conveniently divided into two phases: the

before crushing

Add a hyphen

before-crushing

show examples

phase

and after crushing

phase

. Looking at the first

phase

in more detail we can see that, before being harvested by

hands

Fix the agreement mistake

hand

show examples

or by

special

Add an article

a special

show examples

machine, the

sugar

canes need to grow for 12-18 months to be mature enough. In the final stage of

this

phase

, at the beginning of the manufacturing

process

, they are crushed into juice in

crushing

Correct article usage

a crushing

show examples

machine. Turning to the second

phase

, the juice is heated into syrup in

Change the article

show examples

evaporator, after being purified by a Limestone filter.

Then

sugar

crystais

Correct your spelling

crystals

are separated from

sugar

syrup in a centrifuge. In the final stage of the manufacturing

process

sugar

crystais

Correct your spelling

crystals

turn into

sugar

after being cooked and dried.

Submitted by 695006028 on Mon Aug 14 2023

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar, phase with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

152 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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the diagram shows the manufacturing process of making sugar from sugar cane

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

The government should control the Internet to reduce cyber crime and ensure safety of users. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people suggest that children do not understand the world of work and schools should make all teenagers spend a short time working as well as studying academic subjects. To what extent do you agree?

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree?

Topic: Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Do advantages outweigh the disadvantages? You should write at least 250 words.