It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age .punishment is necessary to help them learn the distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion. What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?

It is necessary for
children
to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early stage
punishment
is significant to assist them learn the distinction. I totally agree with
this
statement, and I would like some punishments can
taken
Change the verb form
be taken
show examples
by
parents
and
teachers
including,
parents
can
control
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
children
Change preposition
of children
show examples
of
technology
, and
teachers
can punish
children
by
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
their marks.
To begin
with, I totally believe
puhishment
Correct your spelling
punishment
is
effective
Add an article
an effective
show examples
method to teach
children
what
right
Add a missing verb
is right
show examples
and wrong.
This
is because
puhishment
Correct your spelling
punishment
send
Correct subject-verb agreement
sends
show examples
clear
Add an article
a clear
show examples
message
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
children
that indiscipline
behaviour
is wrong, which
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can deter
children
commit unacceptable
behaviour
.
For example
, In the UK
teachers
punish
children
who make misbehaviour
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
physicals
Change the noun form
physical
show examples
punishments.
Therefore
,
number
Correct article usage
the number
show examples
of bullying and indiscipline in the UK
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
darmatically
Correct your spelling
dramatically
in schools.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, through
punishment
children
can learn from their mistakes what
correct
Add a missing verb
is correct
show examples
and incorrect, which
this
mean
Replace the word
means
show examples
punishment
can correct the
behaviour
of
children
.
As a result
,
punishment
can contribute to
make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
our society less
violence
Replace the word
violent
show examples
.
Morevoer
Correct your spelling
Moreover
, I would like to suggest some forms of
punishments
Fix the agreement mistake
punishment
show examples
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
taken
Change the verb form
be taken
show examples
by
parents
and
teachers
.
Regarding
Change preposition
Parents
show examples
parents
,
parents
can punish their
children
by
control
Replace the word
controlling
show examples
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
of
technology
namely, smartphones,
computers
Correct word choice
and computers
show examples
.
This
is because
children
in recent times often spend a considerable time in front
these modern
Change the determiner
this modern technology
these modern technologies
show examples
technology
in order to play video games.
Consequently
, by
control
Replace the word
controlling
show examples
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
of
technology
children
will learn they make
wrong
Correct article usage
the wrong
show examples
things. When it comes to
teachers
,
teachers
can punish pupils who commit indiscipline
behaviour
by
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
show examples
their grades in
curriculum
Add an article
the curriculum
show examples
.
For example
, In the Uk
schools
Add a comma
,schools
show examples
there are 20 % of marks for every
subjects
Change to a singular noun
subject
show examples
on
discipline
Add an article
the discipline
show examples
of
children
.
To sum up
, I strongly believe
punishment
is extremely important to correct
behaviour
Correct article usage
the behaviour
show examples
of
children
, and I recommended some actions for
paretns
Correct your spelling
parents
and
teachers
to punish
children
namely,
control
limit
Correct article usage
the limit
show examples
of
usage
of
technology
, and reduce the marks of
children
on
Correct article usage
the curriculem
show examples
curriculem
Correct your spelling
curriculum
.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • punishment
  • positive reinforcement
  • consequences
  • time-outs
  • removal of privileges
  • open communication
  • clear expectations
  • consistency
  • fairness
  • disciplinary action
  • proportionate
  • moral values
  • internalization
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