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Band 4

39. Societies that do not respect and honor their women can never make progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#societies #respect #honor #women #progress
Given are two graphs concerning .
While
 the former graph reveals the
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
average
Change to a plural noun
averages
show examples
 per month , measured in
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, the latter graph indicates the figure of every
year
Change noun form
year's
show examples
 hours of
sunshine
 in three main cities .
Overall
,
Overall
, there is
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 progressive fluctuation witnessed in both temperatures of London and New York, the reverse is true for those of Sydney. Meanwhile, the duration of
sunshine
 in New York is longer than the others’ data. In terms of the temperatures of
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 cities, it is evident to see that the initial
point
 at the beginning of the
year
 is quite the same as that
at the end
 of the
year
 and July is the most special month in the
year
.
Although
 the temperature of
sydney
Change the capitalization
Sydney
show examples
 is hottest at the beginning of the
year
 at merely
twenty six
Add a hyphen
twenty-six
show examples
, it decreases exponentially and continuously to exactly fifteen in July which is the coldest period.
Subsequently
, the temperature of
this
 nation bounces back gradually and constantly to over 25
at the end
 of the
year
. Despite having the same trends, the temperatures in London and New York experience different levels of growth.
While
 the former starts with approximately ten, and it increases rapidly and relentlessly by fifteen, before going down sharply and constantly at nearly
initial
Correct article usage
the initial
show examples
point
, the latter experiences the same growth pattern with starting
point
, peak, ending
point
 with five, 30 and 5 respectively. With regard to hourly
sunshine
 of three cities, the figure of Newyork takes up the most significant hours with 2535, followed by that in Sydney with 2473. Meanwhile,
London
Change preposition
in London
show examples
, hours of
sunshine
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
show examples
 up the least remarkable time with over 1000.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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