some people think that the developments involving the internet have brought people closer together. while others think that people and communities have become more isolated Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #developments #internet #communities

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

At Present, social

media

have

asiginifant

Correct article usage

an asiginifant

show examples

influence on our daily

life

while

some

people

view that

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

led to more connected

communities

and became a pivotal factor in social interaction. Other

people

argue that

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

is the reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

people

’s solitary

amonge

Correct your spelling

among

the

communities

This

essay will discuss both points of view, and argue in favour of the former. At the outset, the abuse of the

internet

and

Correct article usage

the addicion

show examples

addicion

Correct your spelling

addition

addiction

of social

media

are creating isolation among

communities

;

also

, It is increasing the

distence

Correct your spelling

distance

inside households.

In other words

, some individuals are biding their time online in a virtual

life

, and straying away

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

their real

life

Moreover

, engaging in the face to face social activities

such

as family interactions and visiting relatives or friends become out of our

cencening

Correct your spelling

concerning

While

parents pay immense attention

sharing

Change preposition

to sharing

show examples

videos,

photos

Correct word choice

and photos

show examples

and

navigate

Wrong verb form

navigating

show examples

around

internet

Add an article

the internet

show examples

, they neglect their offspring’s needs.

Thus

people

become individually independent away from

thier

Correct your spelling

their

social interaction in reality. In sharp contrast to

this

, the development

Change preposition

show examples

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

is making

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

world contacts easier. When

people

make

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

benficial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

use

of social

media

to be more attached and create

sense

Add an article

a sense

show examples

cumminities

Correct your spelling

communities

. On the level of

families

Change the noun form

family

show examples

interactions,

family

Add an article

the family

show examples

creates online groups, interacts

efficively

Correct your spelling

efficiently

, shares events and exchanges greetings

Change preposition

show examples

ocassions

Correct your spelling

occasion

. If any of

family

Correct article usage

the family

show examples

members

lives

Change the verb form

live

show examples

abroad

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

country, they can make video calls and share their events in live videos. The prominent and famous

charachers

Correct your spelling

characters

character

post their personal daily

life

and events, and fans can share opinions with them.

For example

Add an article

a citizen

the citizen

show examples

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

can watch wedding parties for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

brillient

Correct your spelling

brilliant

characters

such

as the wedding ceremony for the king of

Jordan

Correct article usage

the Jordan

show examples

kingdom. In my opinion,

people

can make

Remove the article

apply

show examples

positive

use

of social

media

and boost social

realtionships

Correct your spelling

relationships

. I believe that

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

internet

Capitalize word

Internet

show examples

Add a missing verb

is an

show examples

amenity to bring

people

together closely and

being

Wrong verb form

show examples

recognised with the community’s news.

However

, it is crucial to interact in

real

Add a hyphen

real-life

show examples

life

situatons

Correct your spelling

situations

too. In

conclsion

Correct your spelling

conclusion

, making abuse of

internet

Correct article usage

the internet

show examples

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

brought

people

to isolation,

Correct word choice

and

show examples

making

Remove the article

apply

show examples

good

use

internet

Add an article

the internet

show examples

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

created a sense of

communities

Fix the agreement mistake

community

show examples

. I believe that positive

use

socail

Correct your spelling

social

media

and

real

Add a hyphen

real-life

show examples

life

situation

Fix the agreement mistake

situations

show examples

are

significent

Correct your spelling

significant

to close

people

to gather.

Submitted by alaan0542 on Mon Aug 14 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
57
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

360 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
These days people spend more than more time at work and less time at home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?
There is no denying the fact that the main impact of work is debatable. It is argued that people recently are spending more time at work than they do at home. In this essay I will discuss why working more can allow for a more flexible financial status, but also can affect both, social and physical health.
6.5
band
Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. Discuss both views and give your opinion
People have different views about whether noise can be made by people as much they want, or it can be hardly controlled. While making noise is obvious, I believe that making unnecessary noise should be prohibited.
7.5
band
Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Other say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Disucss both these view and give your own opinions.
In this modern era,with the help of new technologies such as phones and tablets it is easier for people to watch films at home which is cost-efficient while others think that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. we will discuss both views in the upcoming paragraph. In my opinion, watching the cinema at home is a positive trend which helps you to save money and time.
7.5
band
Some people think residents should keep their streets clean and tidy while others sy it is government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give yto our opinion.
It is considered by some that the duty to keep the cleanliness and sanitation of an area falls upon the people living there, whereas some argue that it is the work of national councils. Although the country has some duty to maintain sanitation, I believe that the local people also need to take part in this.
4.5
band
‘’Prevention is better than cure.’’ Researching and treating diseases is too costly , so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. Do you agree or disagree with the given statement ?
There are a lot of disesae in the world and that diseases’ cures are very high. If they can found preventative from these diesase, it will be cheaper and more sensible. I think, absolutely researchers should study on the preventative and it will be more beneficial for world.

some people think that the developments involving the internet have brought people closer together. while others think that people and communities have become more isolated Discuss both views and give your opinion

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

These days people spend more than more time at work and less time at home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Other say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Disucss both these view and give your own opinions.

Some people think residents should keep their streets clean and tidy while others sy it is government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give yto our opinion.

‘’Prevention is better than cure.’’ Researching and treating diseases is too costly , so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. Do you agree or disagree with the given statement ?