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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

People nowadays send text messages more frequently than they talk on the phone. Do the advantages of texting outweigh the disadvantages?

There are a number of inhabitants who prefer sending
text
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messages
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 to having a talk on the mobile
phone
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 in the present. From my perspective, despite having some drawbacks,
text
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messages
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 are still far more useful than talking on the
phone
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. On the one hand, it is undeniable that transmitting via
messages
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 could bring certain difficulties for the users. To be specific, the main disadvantage of chatting with
people
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 is that it tends to take a significant amount of precious
time
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. The reason behind
this
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 is that individuals have to wait for the reply until the receivers read the
messages
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 and revert to a message.
This
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 waiting period
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between sending and receiving the data squanders the
time
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. To illustrate, a recent study by Cambridge University in England concluded that nearly 2 hours
wasted
Add a missing verb
are wasted
show examples
 by
people
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 sending
text
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messages
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 on a daily basis rather than those who do not.
In addition
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, texting too much could result in some negative effects on health.
For example
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, many researches show that using a
phone
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 once in a
while
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 could affect the
users
Change to a genitive case
user's
users'
show examples
 various illnesses
such
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 as
headache
Fix the agreement mistake
headaches
show examples
.
On the other hand
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, many found
this
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 method to be a convenient way of communication.
Firstly
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, The main merit of communicating via
text
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messages
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 is that
people
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 can answer a message
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 any
time
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 and place.
This
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 is beneficial
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
 for those who have a
full
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
time
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 job and
only
Add a missing verb
are only
show examples
 free at a certain period. In the other word, the receiver can reply
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 a convenient
time
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 as they feel comfortable.
Secondly
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, it is easier to transfer a massive number of data to many
people
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 by chatting on the
phone
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.
For instance
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, companies can advertise their product to a vast amount of consumers by sending texts, which is more efficient and saves a lot of
time
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. In Conclusion, it is understandable for
people
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 to send
text
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messages
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 frequently. In spite of having some disadvantages, it cannot outweigh the advantages of chatting on the
phone
Use synonyms

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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