Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Nowadays, we see
ads
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
everywhere
such
as in the streets, malls and airports.
However
, it's extremely successful to let
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people buy everything. In my opinion, I totally agree
for
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with
show examples
this
statement, and I would like to discuss it in the following paragraphs.
Firstly
, the reason why I agree with because
,
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apply
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we can see
ads
everywhere even
in
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apply
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indoors. What I mean
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
parents and kids will be interested to buy it much fast
they
Correct word choice
as they
show examples
could.
For example
, my dad saw an
advertising
Replace the word
advertisement
show examples
about (back to school). After
that
Add a comma
,that
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my dad went to the student tools shop and bought a small bag for me
instead
of using my old bag.
Moreover
, that's a really good point to not forget to update our tools.
Secondly
, the coming
ads
from the social media
while
, we are using the phone and
ads
come up directly.
For instance
, I was going to watch a video on YouTube before the video started there
were
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was
show examples
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
advertising
Replace the word
advertisement
show examples
appear
Wrong verb form
appeared
show examples
talking about
black
Capitalize word
Black
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Friday
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
shows the discounts
in
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on
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every single
toys
Change to a singular noun
toy
show examples
.
In addition
, I fell in love with the remote car that cost five dollars
instead
ten dollars.
Consequently
, I order it online. Even so,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advertising's
Change noun form
advertising
show examples
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
people
to
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apply
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buy things
we
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
forget to buy.
Finally
, some people don't care or pay attention
the
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to the
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reason that they say it is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
of money and not important to buy it.
Furthermore
, that's
totally
Add an article
a totally
show examples
wrong statement. Technology is coming
for
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apply
show examples
popular, and the
advertisings
Replace the word
advertisements
show examples
are spreading more and more.
Submitted by hamoudisayyah on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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