IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, school children are required to wear school uniforms. Do you think this should be enforced in all schools

#countries #school #children #uniforms #schools
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
Change preposition
At
show examples
present
Add an article
the present
show examples
 time, various schools in different nations do not give permission to their
students
Use synonyms
 to wear casual clothing and bound them to follow the rule of
particular
Correct article usage
a particular
show examples
dress
Use synonyms
code
Fix the agreement mistake
codes
show examples
. I personally deem that
this
Linking Words
 practice should be implemented in other educational institutions too, because it would bring uniformity and avoid environmental distractions for children. To commence with the virtues of uniformity, wearing similar
dress
Use synonyms
 culture would bring equality among children from diverse backgrounds.
This
Linking Words
 means, they may look alike, as it might remove the difference between
Correct article usage
the
show examples
minor's family
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 conditions by giving them
similar
Correct article usage
a similar
show examples
 look.
For instance
Linking Words
,
Delhi
Correct article usage
the Delhi
show examples
 public school of India promotes
identical
Correct article usage
an identical
show examples
 dressing system, where 90%
Use synonyms
students
Change preposition
of students
show examples
 come from unprivileged living conditions and
still
Add a missing verb
are still
show examples
 respected and treated equally by
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
show examples
 of the 10%
enrolled
Change preposition
of enrolled
show examples
students
Use synonyms
belong
Correct pronoun usage
who belong
show examples
 to rich families. Henceforth,
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
above mentioned
Correct your spelling
abovementioned
show examples
 example vividly demonstrates
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
how identical attire could leave
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
show examples
pshycological
Correct your spelling
psychological
 impact on young minds and save several lives from becoming the victim of bullying too.
Moreover
Linking Words
, having a regulation of carrying a particular
dress
Use synonyms
 code can limit the chances of juveniles
Add a missing verb
being distraction
show examples
distraction
Replace the word
distracted
show examples
 from their studies. To expound, when they are not allowed to
dress
Use synonyms
 up distinctively from others, it may require less time for them to get ready.
Also
Linking Words
, they might not get
much opportunity
Change the quantifier
many opportunities
show examples
 to fascinate towards
materialistic
Add an article
the materialistic
show examples
 world, which can lose their attention from their goal. To exemplify
this
Linking Words
, Fairfield School of Pakistan usually announces
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
 academic results annually alongside
issue
Wrong verb form
issuing
show examples
 hefty
fine
Fix the agreement mistake
fines
show examples
 to its
students
Use synonyms
, if they do not follow their prescribed dressing.
Thus
Linking Words
, it could be considered that by following
similar
Correct article usage
a similar
show examples
dress
Use synonyms
 policy, children stay more focused
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 studies. In conclusion, it can be
summarised
Correct your spelling
summarized
show examples
 that
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
enforcement of
dress
Use synonyms
 code tradition offers enormous benefits.
Therefore
Linking Words
, there may not wrong
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
 it, if
this
Linking Words
 regulation is imposed in all schools.
Submitted by meghnabawa91 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: