IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Some countries are struggling with an increase rate in crime. Many people think that increasing police on the roads is the only way to reduce crime. To what extent do you agree ?

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Many people argue that in order to mitigate criminal
activities
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, a large number of police officers should be deployed on the streets. I strongly disagree with
this
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 and believe that there are different areas where they are required and criminal
activities
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 are not just undertaken on roads. To start with, a large number of
security
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 officers would need to be employed.
As a consequence
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, the state might have to suffer economically.
Furthermore
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, the
security
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 department will have to compensate for other official tasks.
This
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 will hamper the efficiency of the department in its
overall
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 job implementation.
For example
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,
due to
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 a surge in harmful
activities
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 in Mumbai, a city in India, a mass of
security
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 officers were deployed from within and out of the state.
This
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 caused severe monetary loss and citizens of other states questioned their productivity in their required areas.
Hence
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, gathering
security
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 for every nook and corner can deviate the attention from their broadly required responsibilities.
Secondly
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, roads are not solely responsible for unethical behaviour. These can take place in underground subways, buildings, parks etc.
Although
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 safeguarding cannot be present everywhere, society can be made aware of strict legal penalties and penalisation.
This
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 would make the criminals conscious of the result of any type of inappropriate actions.
For instance
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, after the declaration of the death sentence to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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rapists, the rape rates in India witnessed a downward trend.
Therefore
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, governmental intervention with regard to the implementation of regulations should be introduced.
To conclude
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, there are various ways to eliminate the risks of harmful
activities
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. These strategies should be used than rising patrol in the states.

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