IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Currently, many people fail to balance the work with the other parts of lives. What are the reasons and how

#people #balance #work #parts #lives
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Recently, many
people
Use synonyms
 have struggled to make a balance between their personal lives and their work. There are several contributions to
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon,
such
Linking Words
 as high personal expectations from society and
spereading
Correct your spelling
spreading
 of technology. To tackle
this
Linking Words
 issue governments should make rules preventing
people
Use synonyms
 from
viatel
Correct your spelling
vital
 labour laws.
In addition
Linking Words
, increase
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 awareness of their mental health. Technology is booming more and more ,
this
Linking Words
 leads to
make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
 a load on
employees
Use synonyms
 to be in
countiuse
Correct your spelling
continues
 development because they
afried
Correct your spelling
afraid
 of being replaced.
For instance
Linking Words
, Ghat Gpt now is working as a university of knowledge it has many
answer
Change to a plural noun
answers
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 our problems in life .
Hence
Linking Words
 , workers are
afried
Correct your spelling
afraid
 to be replaced by artificial intelligent s.
Moreover
Linking Words
, high exceptions of society make the
employees
Use synonyms
 answer job emails in their spare time.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 will have a problem of working for many hours. To address
this
Linking Words
 situation, governments should make rules to prevent
viatle
Correct your spelling
viable
little
 labour
lows
Correct your spelling
laws
show examples
 and limit hours of working per day. To explain, in the Netherlands ,
employees
Use synonyms
 are not exceeding working for
8hours
Correct your spelling
8 hours
 per day.
Additionally
Linking Words
, increasing
Use synonyms
employees
Change noun form
employees'
employee's
show examples
awareness of their mental health and
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
setting
Change the form of the verb
set
show examples
a barrier between professional and personal life will
also
Linking Words
 solve
this
Linking Words
 issue.
For example
Linking Words
, Irush
people
Use synonyms
 make a separation between their
week ends
Correct your spelling
weekends
show examples
 days and their time of work ,
esppecially
Correct your spelling
especially
, teachers there
they
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 are not answering their
students
Change to a genitive case
student's
students'
show examples
 questions
during
Change preposition
at
show examples
Add an article
the week
show examples
week end
Correct your spelling
weekend
show examples
. In conclusion, currently, many
people
Use synonyms
are have
Change the verb form
are having
show examples
 challenges in balancing
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their personal and professional lives, because of,
Add an article
a
the
show examples
decline of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
metal heath
Correct your spelling
mental health
show examples
 awareness among
employees
Use synonyms
 and the wide development of technology.
Submitted by someysamanoudi on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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