Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #products #levels #sugar #health #people

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It is obvious that sugary

products

Use synonyms

have a negative impact on our health. Considering

this

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fact, some would suggest that the

government

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should obligate producing companies to make them more expensive so that

people

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find it more difficult to buy them. I agree with

this

Linking Words

argument to some extent. I believe that

although

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increasing the price is an efficient

way

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, there are some matters that we should consider when doing that. There are several reasons why making consumers pay more for sugary

products

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can be a wonderful

way

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to address

this

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problem. The primary reason is that it allows the

government

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to change

this

Linking Words

harmful behaviour directly. To explain more, consuming unhealthy foods and drinks can harm an individual’s well-being, but not everyone knows that. I believe that some

people

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are not knowledgeable enough to consider it

while

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shopping, and It takes more time to educate them. By establishing

this

Linking Words

new policy,

however

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, the

government

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can change their behaviour within a shorter period of time. Another important point is that since most countries offer free healthcare services, every patient costs a lot to the

government

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As a result

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, it is reasonable for politicians to be more careful about the public health budget, even if that means they need to establish strict policies about that.

On the other hand

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, when considering socioeconomic policies, we need to take everything into account. First of all, in order to function well, our body needs to intake a certain amount of sugar. If the companies rise the cost of sugary

products

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people

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who are struggling with poverty will not be able to intake the necessary amount of them, and

this

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might lead to another public-health-related problem.

In addition

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, it is evident that we can not succeed by only putting a lot of pressure on society. The

government

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should provide the nation with some alternative options. It should determine the main reasons why

people

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prefer to buy sugary

products

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and offer them options that are equally desirable. In conclusion, I restate that increasing the cost of sugary

products

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can be an effective

way

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for changing

this

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unfavourable consumption pattern.

However

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, we need to find an alternative

way

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to help poor

people

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to receive the amount of sugar which is needed for their health, and try to offer society better options.

Submitted by athena.karimzadeh on Sat Aug 19 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

384 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

health problems
manufactured food and drink products
sugary products
excessive sugar consumption
discourage
promote
healthier choices
reduce
increased taxes
fund
health education
prevention programs

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Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some school are very strict about their school uniforms and the appearance of their pupils, While other schools have a very relaxed dress code. (What are the advantages and disadvantages of children of having a school uniform?)

You recently purchased a piece of equipment for your kitchen but it did not work properly. Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter: Describe the problem with the equipment. Explain how this issue has affected you. State what you would like the store to do about it.

Improvements in health, education and trend are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibilities for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People behave differently when they wear different clothes. Do you agree that different clothes influence the way people behave?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.