IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Question It is observed that today communication between family members in today’s times is less as compared to the past. However, some people do not think so. Do you agree or disagree?

#communication #members #today’s #times #people
In these
Change preposition
These
show examples
 days, some
people
 believe that
communication
 with family
member
Fix the agreement mistake
members
show examples
 has decreased as compared to the past. On the other side, some
people
 think
is
Correct pronoun usage
that is
show examples
 not the case.
In
Change preposition
This
show examples
this
 essay will discuss why I
am completely agree
Change the verb form
completely agree
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
communication
 has deteriorated in the
last
 period of
time
.
To begin
 with,
people
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 to work longer hours which
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
the
Change the word
their
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 interactions with other family
members
. The main reason
of
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for
show examples
that is
 inflation in many countries around the world
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
people
 need to work longer hours to be able to afford their bills.
Consequently
,
this
 has a negative impact
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the
time
 they are able to spend with their
children's
Change noun form
children
show examples
or other family
members
.
For example
, in the UK has an increase of 20% of
people
 need to do
over
Correct your spelling
overtime
show examples
time
 at work to be able to afford their utilities.
Furthermore
,
people
 are passing more
time
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social media rather than interacting
face to
Add a hyphen
face-to
show examples
face
.
Therefore
,
people
 prefer to speak to their family
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their telephone even if they are in the same house which affects social interactions with
your
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
family
members
.
This
 can
impacted
Change the verb form
impact
show examples
negative
Change the adjective
negatively
show examples
 in the
communication
 between the family.
For instance
, in
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
people
 are spending 40 % of their
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social media which
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
personal interactions. In conclusion, the
communication
 between family
members
 has reduced over
time
. In
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 we discussed the reason
of
Change preposition
for
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 that. In my opinion,
this
 has happened due
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
time
spending
Replace the word
spent
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social media and television
instaed
Correct your spelling
instead
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
interactive
Replace the word
interact
show examples
face to
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
show examples
face
 with your family.
Submitted by usoncata on

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