It is important for all towns and cities to have large outdoor public spaces such as squared and parks. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It has been frequently argued that urban

areas

ought to keep space for playgrounds or public parks. I completely agree with the statement as it could bring ample benefits to the life of dwellers and the same

would

Wrong verb form

will

show examples

be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs.

To begin

with, if all cities would construct beautiful gardens, specifically for each area, it could have the following benefits.

Initially

, parks or grounds, which have been maintained properly with flowers and trees would provide the best view.

Consequently

, they could visit frequently there and get relief from mental stress and fatigue for the whole day.

Besides

, these places are merely sources of fresh air in developed

areas

as most of these

areas

are covered with buildings and roads.

For instance

, the harmful gases or the pollution exhausted by vehicles could be purified by planting trees since they consume carbon dioxide and exhale fresh air

that is

oxygen in surroundings,

subsequently

, inhabitants could consume fresh air.

Furthermore

, human beings could utilise public parks for spending quality time and it is useful for them in plenty of ways.

Firstly

, children could play outdoor sports on a daily basis and it would provide a plethora of advantages to their health.

For example

, in concrete

areas

, they could barely enjoy as they have to play video games or operate electronic gadgets in their spare time,

whereas

, open places would encourage them to play.

Apart from

this

, adults could go for morning and evening walks,

therefore

, they could get relief from health problems. In conclusion, if councils would provide space and build gardens for dwellers, it could provide them with many benefits and they could lead a healthy and happy life.

Submitted by lavisharma622 on Sun Aug 20 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are more substantial and clearly linked to the topic. Use the introduction to present the main points and ideas, and the conclusion to summarize the main arguments and provide a final thought.

task achievement

Provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points. Link your arguments to the specific benefits of parks and public spaces in urban areas.

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

community interaction
social hubs
physical activity
relaxation
mental health
urban heat islands
air quality
habitats
cultural events
recreational activities
vibrancy
tourism
property value
green spaces
well-maintained

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Technology is being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

It is a positive thing that people who are in senior management positions in companies have much higher salaries than other employees in the same company or organization. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than local languages.If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?

Obesity is an increasing public health problem in some parts of the world. Explain some possible reasons for this problem, and suggest some solutions. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.