IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

It is crucial for all towns and cities to have large public spaces such as squares and parks. Do you agree or disagree with statement?

#towns #cities #spaces #squares #parks
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In
this
Linking Words
 modern era,
due to
Linking Words
 the development of
Use synonyms
cities
Add a comma
,cities
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 the extinction of
parks
Use synonyms
 and other public spaces are getting surged. I agree with the statement that gardens and public squares are crucial
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 all
cities
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are numerous benefits
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 having green
parks
Use synonyms
 and squares in developing
cities
Use synonyms
. Breathing fresh
air
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 plays
vital
Add an article
a vital
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 role for all the citizens, to reduce the
air
Use synonyms
 by planting more trees and construction of
parks
Use synonyms
 are must in all
cities
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
air
Use synonyms
 is getting polluted
due to
Linking Words
 more construction of industries
due to
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 large extent of gas is released which is harmful for residents living in those areas. Another reason
as
Correct your spelling
is
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 more production of
vehicle
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vehicles
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 which
results
Add the preposition
inresults
fromresults
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 more usage of it by which unnecessarily
air
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 is getting polluted which disturbs the environment so having greenery and huge public spaces would be useful.
For example
Linking Words
, In India, the state named Delhi is known as
world’s
Correct article usage
the world’s
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 most populated because in the past an incident occurred about the flats which got destroyed
due to
Linking Words
 some reasons and
leads
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lead
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 to some airborne particles in the
air
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 till today. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand, employees who have to be consistent
to
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in
show examples
 their work by completing
task
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the task
a task
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 before
deadline
Correct article usage
the deadline
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 and
compete
Wrong verb form
competing
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to
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with
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 their
rivalry
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rival
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 companies which creates cut-throat competition among them leads to more stress,
pressure
Correct word choice
and pressure
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 as hectic days by spending more hours on their work
so
Correct word choice
apply
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to relax and have some leisure time, unwind their stress maximum gardens should be added
in particular
Linking Words
 towns or
cities
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
senior citizens can
also
Linking Words
 visit
garden
Add an article
the garden
show examples
 as it is necessary to remain physically and mentally healthy.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children are glued to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
due to
Linking Words
more
Correct article usage
the more
show examples
 digital era as the public
parks
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 and squares are being wiped out
that
Correct word choice
which
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effects
Correct your spelling
affects
show examples
 children in lack of
having
Unnecessary verb
apply
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social
skill
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skills
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.
For example
Linking Words
, now in
India
Add a comma
,India
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 a rule is passed by
government
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the government
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 to have at least one public park in each area of their downtown
cities
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. In conclusion, public spaces will bring
huge
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a huge
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amount
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amounts
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 of advantages for people’s health
due to
Linking Words
 higher population level and boost
out
Change preposition
apply
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their stress and many other factors are included.
Submitted by pooja22nov on

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