IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people think that new houses should be built in the same style as older houses in the local area. Others disagree and say that local authorities should allow people to build homes in the styles of their own choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #houses #style #area #authorities #homes #styles #choice
The demand for new
houses
 is on the rise in communities
due to
 the growing population in the area.
While
 some argue that housing concepts should be based on traditional ones, from my perspective, the government should allow
people
 to construct homes
according to
 their needs. It would bring more opportunities to the
community
. On the one hand, Some
people
 believe that new
houses
 should follow traditional construction patterns, as local companies with years of experience building the same type of homes can make them quickly.
This
 will help to meet the rising demand for
houses
.
Additionally
, these old-style buildings are best suited for middle-class families as they are reliable and affordable.
Moreover
, some suggest that
this
 approach will promote equality among
community
 members.
For instance
,
people
 cannot be discriminated against based on the appearance of their
houses
, as they will all have the same design.
On the other hand
, if
people
 are given the freedom to choose the design of their
houses
 in local residential areas, it will likely attract more
people
.
This
 will result in a greater demand for architects, interior designers, and other related professions, ultimately benefiting the
community
 as a whole.
Moreover
,
this
 will allow individuals to create a home that truly reflects their personality and style, leading to a more diverse and vibrant
community
. In conclusion,
while
 issuing permits to individuals for constructing their
houses
 with unique designs can have various benefits, the same housing idea can tackle severe problems
such
 as a housing crisis.
Submitted by gurisidhu95214 on

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coherence cohesion
To enhance the coherence and cohesion of your essay, consider organizing your ideas more clearly and connecting them with better transitions. Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, each serving its specific purpose.
task achievement
For a higher task response score, work on providing a more comprehensive discussion of both views and your own opinion. Incorporate a balanced argument while ensuring your opinion is clearly stated and supported with specific examples and reasons.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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