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Writing Samples
Band 7

The pie charts below compare water usage in San Diego, California and the rest of the world.

The pie charts below compare water usage in San Diego, California and the rest of the world.
#water #usage #san #diego #california #rest #world
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The pie charts give information about the
water
Use synonyms
 used for residential, industrial and agricultural purposes in
San
Use synonyms
Diego
Use synonyms
 County,
California
Use synonyms
 and the world as a whole. It is noticeable that more
water
Use synonyms
 is consumed by homes than by industry or agriculture in the two American regions.
By contrast
Linking Words
, agriculture accounts for the vast majority of the
water
Use synonyms
 used worldwide. In
San
Use synonyms
Diego
Use synonyms
 County and
California
Use synonyms
 State, residential
water
Use synonyms
 consumption accounts for 60% and 39% of total
water
Use synonyms
 usage.
However
Linking Words
, a mere 8% of the
water
Use synonyms
 used globally goes to homes. The opposite trend can be seen when we look at
water
Use synonyms
 consumption for agriculture.
This
Linking Words
 accounts for a massive 69% of global
water
Use synonyms
 use, but only 17% and 28% of
water
Use synonyms
 usage in
San
Use synonyms
Diego
Use synonyms
 and
California
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 respectively.
Such
Linking Words
 dramatic differences are not seen when we compare the figures for industrial
water
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 use. The same proportion of
water
Use synonyms
 (23%) is used by industry in
San
Use synonyms
Diego
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 and worldwide,
while
Linking Words
 the figure for
California
Use synonyms
 is 10% higher, at 33%.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, san, diego, california with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • households
  • significant
  • industrial use
  • implications
  • agriculture
  • geographical
  • climatic
  • economic factors
  • patterns
  • sustainability
  • practices
  • surprising
  • exceptionally
  • improvements
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