In the modern world¬, it is no longer necessary to use animals as food or other products, such as medicines and clothing. Do you agree or disagree?

#world¬ #animals #food #products #medicines

Processed products are now getting more and more rampant in today's society and

animals

as a source of

meat

and other items like medicines and clothes might not be required in today's setting. I do not agree with

this

statement and in

this

essay, I shall explain why. Having invented a different approach to how we address the shortage of food is a sight to behold. The cultivation of

meat

in the laboratory is ingenious and has its merits: fewer animal killings,

therefore

, endangered

animals

could have a chance to populate. But there is always a different side of the coin.

Animals

that are not endangered would increase

Correct word choice

and, thus

show examples

thus

, are hard to contain.

Nonetheless

, we do not know the long-term implications these genetically modified products

does

Verb problem

have

show examples

on our bodies. Bill Gates,

for example

, funded research for lab-grown

meat

to counter famine in certain areas of the globe. And it has been said that

this

meat

is ready to roll out anytime

this

year. Undeniably, it

had

Wrong verb form

has

show examples

been studied by our scientists for years;

however

, human testing

had

Wrong verb form

has

show examples

not been conducted yet. What I fear is that the whole world might be considered as the test subjects and whatever the results might be, it would be used for future reference. Definitely, the disadvantage would reach as far as the medicines and items of clothing.

Animals

are an integral source for the creation of drugs. Lard (animal fat),

for instance

, is used by medical laboratory scientists when they isolate and test certain bacteria and fungi. Without the animal byproduct, it probably not have the same effect. Another example would be the silkworm where the source of silk comes from. There are counterparts for

this

however

, not entirely the same.

To conclude

although

this

contribution of scientists to society is not entirely frowned upon, the outcome and effects, in the long run, are unknown so far. There might be serious side effects that the future generation will suffer

instead

Submitted by chalabarite14 on Tue Aug 22 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that subsequent sentences build upon it to strengthen the argument. Use more cohesive devices to create a seamless flow between ideas and paragraphs.

task achievement

Expand on each point with relevant examples and evidence. Do not introduce new ideas without proper explanation or examples. Refer back to the question throughout the essay to keep your response focused and relevant.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

326 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admissions to museums outweigh the disadvantages?”
There are debates about wether museum should charge admission or not. However the fact stated that museum with admission fee have a less visitor than the free ones. I must say, charging people for admission to museums has more disadvantages which will be discussed in this essay.
4.5
band
The responsibility of bringing up children should be shared equally between mother and father. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Children are the backbone of each and every nation and childhood period is a golden era. Some cliam that parents should share equally the responsibility of rising kids. I strongly agree with this statement because women work like men and two side of moniters help more, this essay shall discuss it briefly in the following reasons.
5.5
band
Today, many people do not know their neighbour in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?
There can be little doubt that a person who doesn't know their neighbour in large cities. This problem is attributed to playing games and being too lazy to go outside but can be addressed by discipline games and encouraging them to go outside do activities, play business and do gymnastics.
6.5
band
The number of indigenous tribes living traditional lives in the world’s rainforests is decreasing. Within a few decades the last of these indigenous tribes may have disappeared forever. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to prevent it from happening?
The aboriginal tribes living in the world’s tropical rainforests are descending. For more than a few decades, the rest of the native tribes may have forever evanesced. This essay will discuss one of the main problems associated with indigenous groups living in rainforests in decreasing numbers nowadays and suggest a viable solution.
8
band
Some people say that the only way to get success is to go to universities. Others say that it depends on other factors. What is your opinion?
There are tremendously controversial perspectives heating a debate over how to get high accomplishments. While some hold a strong view that getting access to Colleges is the sole method, the opposite makes a statement that there are alternative determinants. While each has its own redeeming features, I would contend that it is optimal to combine both mentioned statements.

In the modern world¬, it is no longer necessary to use animals as food or other products, such as medicines and clothing. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admissions to museums outweigh the disadvantages?”

The responsibility of bringing up children should be shared equally between mother and father. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today, many people do not know their neighbour in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

The number of indigenous tribes living traditional lives in the world’s rainforests is decreasing. Within a few decades the last of these indigenous tribes may have disappeared forever. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to prevent it from happening?

Some people say that the only way to get success is to go to universities. Others say that it depends on other factors. What is your opinion?