IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table shows the income and expenditure of Brooklyn Hall, the building used to hire in over the period of three years.

The table shows the income and expenditure of Brooklyn Hall, the building used to hire in over the period of three years.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table illustrates changes in
income
Use synonyms
 and spending of a building for lease named Brooklyn Hall in three separate years.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 its expenditure had increased far more considerably than
overall
Linking Words
 revenue, so profit had dropped over
this
Linking Words
 period. Hire of rooms remained the largest source of
income
Use synonyms
 throughout these years, with fluctuations between 32,000 and 34,000
pounds
Use synonyms
. Fundings of council tower and other bodies had decreased by 5,000 and 2,000
pounds
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 cafe sales, which contribute a
significant
Change the adjective
significantly
show examples
 smaller
income
Use synonyms
, had doubled from 3,000 to 6,000
pounds
Use synonyms
. Brooklyn Hall recorded a noticeable growth of 6,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 in total
income
Use synonyms
, and an enormous increase in it is running costs, reaching 77,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 in the
last
Linking Words
 year. Meanwhile, profit saw a corresponding fall from 9,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 to only 1,000
pounds
Use synonyms
 by the end of the period in question.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words income, pounds with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: