IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Currently, many people fail to balance the work with the other parts of lives. What are the reasons and how to solve it?

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In the current era, some individuals play multiple roles in their personal and professional lives.
This
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 issue makes a contribution to the challenge of balancing their job and other parts of human life. The problem of
work
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 and life interference is caused by mismanaging
time
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 and can result in dissatisfaction and depression. The possible solutions to
this
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 problem will be discussed in the following paragraphs. The potential reason for
this
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 imbalance is manifold. Throughout the world, economic conditions play a key role in the stage of satisfaction. In
this
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 regard, plenty of people sacrifice their
time
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 to
work
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 hard and earn more money.
For instance
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, an adult person trying to survive and to be successful must burn the midnight oil to meet the employer’s exceptions.
Furthermore
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, these days, the population especially the younger ones waste a lot of
time
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 on social media and doing useless things.
Thus
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, working hard and wasting much
time
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 makes a contribution to mismanaging and unbalancing.
On the other hand
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, there are several solutions that community members can take to address the problem above. It is crystal clear that these days, workers forget their Spiritual needs. For the first step, they must know their needs, prioritize them, and
then
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 make a plan that helps them to achieve their goals.
In addition
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, companies should take action to reduce the pressure on workers. By way of example, creating a healthy
work
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 environment takes drastic steps to enhance
work
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 efficiency and productivity.
To sum up
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,
according to
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 what has already been discussed, wasting
time
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 and high employer expectations are the main reasons the numerous individuals failed to maintain a steadiness between their job and personal growth. Actions should be taken along fronts: one should try to be on schedule, forming an awareness of human needs, and the policymakers should provide a better environment.

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task response
Ensure that the essay fully addresses the prompt by covering all important aspects of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. However, there is room for improvement in the organization of ideas within paragraphs to enhance coherence and cohesion.
lexical resource
Expand the range of vocabulary used and ensure that words are accurately utilized in context to enhance the lexical resource.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure, verb tenses, and grammatical accuracy to improve the grammatical range.
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