The chart below shows figures for attendances at hospital emergency care departments in Northern Ireland by age group in December 2016 and 2017.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The bar chart illustrates the visit of different age groups to the Casualty unit of a certain hospital in Northern Ireland in the month of December 2016 to 2017.

Overall

Linking Words

, from the chart, those aged 75 & above have higher emergency cases, followed by those under 5 years than other categories are relatively the same except aged 5 -15 which was the lowest. From December 2016, it was shown that the attendance of 75years and above to the clinic was at the rate of above 60.0, next was about 50.0 for those below 5,

then

Linking Words

the groups aged 14 - 44, 45 - 64, and 65 - 74 falls above 20.0 and stays within 30.0.

While

Linking Words

20.0 was for those Aging between 5 - 15.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, in 2017, they all experienced an increase in hospital visits, with a significant 10.0 top-up for 75 & above, second to people below 5 years rising up to 50.5,

then

Linking Words

the categories of 45 - 64 and 65 - 74 raised slightly by 0.4 and

lastly

Linking Words

, 0.2 increase for both the ages of 5 - 15 and 16 - 44 respectively.

zikahill48Wed Aug 23 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

▼

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

187 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

chart analysis
attendances
emergency care departments
trend
age group
patient admissions
year-on-year comparison
statistical variation
healthcare system
data interpretation
percentage increase/decrease
demographics
healthcare planning
resource management
peak times

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?
these days children are facing severe pressure by their parents to become successful in life. In my opinion this is positive change, eventhough there is some drawbacks. In this essay, i will explore it.
7
band
Nowadays, more and more people to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?
In contemporary society, there is a growing trend of individuals opting to have children later in life. This shift can be attributed to several factors, each carrying its own set of advantages and disadvantages.
4.5
band
Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion
Working module is one of the most
7
band
Eating too much sugar is harmful to health. Some people think it is the government’s responsibility to limit people’s sugar consumption, while others think it is an individual’s responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Overusing sugar has negative effects on health. Several individuals consider that authorities should control the amount of sugar people consume whereas others believe that everybody should have sugar usage limitations for themselves. I will discuss both ideas in this essay as long as I agree that it is people's responsibility.
5.5
band
Many people believe that countries should produce food for the whole population and import as little food as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is no doubt that food is a fundamental need of a nation. However, there are several countries that conduct massive import of foods from another countries. I have a balanced view regarding this issue.

The chart below shows figures for attendances at hospital emergency care departments in Northern Ireland by age group in December 2016 and 2017.

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a negative or positive development?

Nowadays, more and more people to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Eating too much sugar is harmful to health. Some people think it is the government’s responsibility to limit people’s sugar consumption, while others think it is an individual’s responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people believe that countries should produce food for the whole population and import as little food as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?