Some people believe that to give opportunuties to the new generation, companies should encourage high level employees who are older than 55 to retire. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #opportunuties #generation #companies #level #employees

Many of the public argue that employment privileges should be created for the younger generation. The private organization could open the door to recruiting skilled job skiers who fall below 55 years old. In

this

essay, I will elaborate on the purpose of higher younger age. To decline the illiteracy rate.My opinion straight forward is that I will agree with the given statement.

Firstly

, many countries like developed and third nations have common methods to sort of employees in private companies and government organisations.

Due to

experience in handling stressful situations or pressure.

On the other hand

, placement can be given to younger adults to work faster and energetically to increase productivity heel income.

For Example

, the young public accelerated with upgraded methods of learning in terms of technology and hands-on skills. to attract new customers.

Moreover

, reduces in crime rate involving them in work.

Secondly

in contrast

however

, to make smooth running of company is foremost vitally important with the older aged and experienced person can digest all problem in a calm, quiet nature. The majority of products may be the same don,t attract many buyers to buy.

For instance

, knowledge skills repeated their content . hard in learning large amounts to run profitable companies thesis may allow payment not in regular interval. In conclusion, everyone has to join their hand for employment to the fresher.

This

may increase in literacy rate and reduce crime making busy with work. to spread with updated software would attract the majority of the customers. I recommend everyone should take action in hiring regular placements.

Submitted by khesh22naik on Thu Aug 24 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. The ideas are not logically organized and the main points are not well supported.

task achievement

The essay does not fully address the task. The response is not comprehensive and lacks clear, relevant examples.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that to give opportunuties to the new generation, companies should encourage high level employees who are older than 55 to retire. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at a primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages??

It is important for people to take risk, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweuigh the disadvatages ?

A government has a responsibility to its citizens to ensure their safety. Therefore, some people think that the government should increase spending on defense but spend less on social benefits. To what extend do you agree?

Online shopping seems to be replacing the traditional method of buying. However some buyers are sceptical of this practice. Discuss both benefits and risks associated with online shopping.